a song of foxes and flowers ( peaky blinders )

perfume and paralysis

notes: sorry for my absence! this has been kind of a secondary, "write when i get ideas" story, so it hasn't taken as much priority, but i'm happy to get this chapter up :) thanks for reading!

The ground under her felt different, Alice realized as she stirred from a shallow, rather inconvenient sleep. Her back and her head throbbed, but it was hard to focus on that. Everything felt different. The surface beneath was an actual bed, she realized— the good kind. One that was familiar and comfortable enough to sink into, made of feathers and thick blankets. Catching a whiff of a particular kind of perfume, something fancy and completely nostalgically beautiful— Alice realized it was her Aunt Polly's.

She was in her Aunt Polly's room, comfortable and noticeably cleaner than she was last night.

Her eyes flew open like pub doors when she connected the dots, eager to make sure everything was real. Her surroundings only made her heart explode with joy. It was exactly how she last saw it.

She was home. Home, safe and sound, where everything was okay.

It took her another second to process herself, after smelling the soap lingering on her skin and realizing she must have had a bath recently. Not a single spec of dirt, feeling cleaner than she had been in weeks — not one bruise or scrape anywhere to be seen, either. Not even on her knees, where they permanently seemed to house cuts from her rather clumsy tumbles on cobbled streets.

She was in a nightgown; one of her old favorites, baby blue and innocent and suddenly... a little embarrassing to be in. She hadn't ever thought of it as embarrassing before, but now it was... a little girl's dress. Lace and bows itched at her clean skin, when she was now used to linen and that thick trouser material she couldn't name.

It felt like a mockery to wear her childhood nightgown; like she was disrespecting the past in some way. She was mocking a dead girl by dressing up as her.

Alice Shelby was ancient, and she did not belong in a little girl's dress.

The third and final odd thing about that moment was... her hair. It was so long, so heavy, flowing all the way over her shoulders to the end of her ribs. Thick dirty blonde waves, flowing freely and cut evenly. Just like it was the day she disappeared. She couldn't force herself to raise her hand and rake a hand through her waves, like her bones were arguing with her out of exhaustion.

Only yesterday, it was all cut off. Barely there, just short wisps sticking up in random directions. She knew it from the air on the back of her neck, now just a ghost of the past. She moped about how awful the haircut was just a few hours ago, and like the universe answered her calls... Her hair returned to the way it should be.

Only yesterday, she was wearing boys clothes and going by Albert or Flynn or something along those lines. How did she get there? How was she back in her Aunt Pol's bed?

It used to happen occasionally, before she disappeared. She'd have nightmares about something stupid and run to her Aunt's room, crawling under her nice blankets and burying her face into the pillows while she waited for Polly to find her. Almost every time, she'd fall asleep and wake up disoriented.

Before that, Alice would breathe in the scent of her Aunt — her perfume and shampoo lingering in the soft pillowcases would immediately comfort her. Soon, her Pol would find her there, and coax her into talking about the nightmare if she were still awake. If she were asleep, she'd stay with her and make sure she got a good night's rest.