I belong to you

Grayson Smith

Hi I'm Grayson short Gray, I'm 21 and that's my Story.

Since the day I was born, my life has been fucked up.

I never met my dad the only thing I know about him is his name. He got my mom pregnant and then cheated on her with his ex, she left him and he claimed that I'm not his child, barely paid child support and never made an effort to get to know me. I still can help but think that if he had been there, everything might be different now. 

I used to live with my mom and Grandparents or her boyfriend's in Germany. My Grandpa would often visit Manchester with me, to show me the city he grew up with. I remember being a normal happy boy in England, the complete obvious of Germany. When I turned 9, my mom found Michael. We moved in with him and that's when everything got worse. If something went wrong it was my fault. Physical and emotional abuse was now a part of my daily routine. When I turned 12 I started cutting because my grandpa died and I didn't have anyone to talk anymore and it helped me to start going numb, which is better than having to suffer in pain daily. I also felt free, I was the one in control, I decided how much it should hurt or how deep. I have often tried to stop but that's one of the only things I have influence over. And honestly at this point I don't care anymore.

My other escape is drawing, it feels like the time stands still and only me and the picture exist. I think that's my kind of therapy. Drawing has always been my safe place, since I was little. I think I can do it quite well, but I have never really shown anyone my drawings. I'm quite insecure about everything, even if I don't show it.

After two suicide attempts, I decided to start over without my family, if you want to call it that at all. I recently moved to London and work as a police officer. I love it. Locking away bad people gives me satisfaction.

I never told anyone my story or that I hurt myself, beside my best friend. People only use something like this against you. So shut the fuck up and don't open up to anyone EVER!

I know this is the typical badboy quote but I don't do relationships. I have fun with girls and then I will never talk to them again. I don't believe in love. I have never experienced love and I will never love anyone! At least that's what I thought until I met Belle.

Gray's Apartment

Bedroom

Living room

Kitchen

Bathroom

Gray's Car

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I hope you liked this part and you like Gray :)

Stay safe, I'm so proud of you.<3
See you in the next chapter.

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