Invictus

Nature

There was a tree in the Lightwoods’ backyard that held special meaning to Alec.

Plants had always had, but this one was unique and deeply significant. It was a sanctuary, a refuge for the lost souls, a way-out of life’s daily struggles.

There was something soothing about being surrounded by plants, something bigger than Alec, bigger than anyone. It lived and lasted beyond human years. In the vast empire of nature, Alec was just another organism, another animal. It was liberating. His problems and sorrows, his struggles and torments, they didn’t exist in this reality, and the wind sweeping through the branches and leaves never cast a disapproving glance or whispered doubts and judgments.

In the backyard, Alec was simply Alec.

He used to sit against the trunk with either a book or his own mind to keep him company and lose himself in the simple beauty of nature, somehow both complex and so utterly uncomplicated.

More than his father's own passion for the wild lands and plains, perhaps it was this exact tree that had given him his love for flowers and plants, so it was only natural that he would have become a florist.

Flowers were a simple thing, fragile and strong all at once, but they held a power beyond imagination. They conveyed emotions better than words ever could - or at least they did for Alec, who had never been praised for his eloquence.

He could easily express love, friendship or grief with a bouquet, apologies or congratulations.

Flowers spoke to him better than people did.

There was always an exception to it, and it materialized in the form of three obnoxious, meddling, annoying siblings. Well, two. The third one was none of these things.

The summer heat was scorching and even the shelter of the tree didn't cast enough shadow to save him from the beating rays of the sun that day. He heard the sound of the crutches coming his way before he actually saw Max, too lost in thoughts that he was.

“You could make it easier for me to find you, you know,” his little brother said as he threw his crutches carelessly to the side, leaning on the trunk of the tree for support.

Alec jerked to his feet to help him sit down, guilt still lurching in his stomach after all these years.

When Max was comfortably settled, he sat back down next to him.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “Needed to think.”

“You mean you needed to torture yourself,” Max retorted.

He had always been too shrewd for his years. It hadn't changed now that he wasn't a child anymore.

Alec didn't reply, resting his head against the trunk. “I've got something for you,” he said eventually.

Max rolled his eyes. “You know it's not my birthday, right?”

“Shut up,” Alec grumbled and grabbed the paper bag he had brought with his few books, knowing Max would come and find him soon enough, handing it over.

Max didn't make much ceremony of tearing it apart, his hazel eyes - so similar to Alec's - gleaming with excitement.

His face broke into a wide grin at the sight of the dreamcatcher in his hands. “Thanks, Alec.”

Alec reached out to ruffle his hair and forced a smile to his lips, swallowing past the lump in his throat.

Max wasn’t that easy to fool. His face turned serious, brow furrowing. “You know I don't blame you, right?” he asked, but it was more of a statement. “For all this.” He gestured vaguely to his legs. “So you can stop blaming yourself.”

Alec shrugged, his throat burning with the need to scream. Not at Max, but at the rest of the world.

“I know,” he whispered.

They both knew it was a lie, but they made sure not to mention it.

Sitting together below the tree in the Lightwood’s backyard, they were at peace, and nothing else mattered.