9 Boyfriends

Chapter 42

North led me to the bleachers and up to the top. We had to shimmy past some people that were already sitting down, but eventually we made it to an open section of the bleachers. North sat and pulled me down next to him, immediately sliding his arm around my waist.

I watched six cars slowly drive up to the line in three rows of two. There was a giant pole that looked like a stop light, but instead it had three yellow lights between the red and green light. The light was currently red. The announcer was calling out the names of the drivers, but I couldn’t understand anything he was saying. I heard a loud beep and saw the red light turn off and the first yellow light come on. Another beep and the light moved down to the second yellow light, then down again. Finally a longer beep sounded and the green light turned on. At the same time all six cars revved the engines and sped off down the track. The dirt kicked up and it was hard to see through it at first. Once the cars separated a little, the dirt didn’t pick up as much. I watched them go around the first turn leading to the other side of the track. When they passed the starting line they continued on, it must be a multi lap race. There was a giant scoreboard at the far end of the track, which now lit up with six numbers. I looked at North who noticed my confusion.

“Those are the standings so far. Car 52 is at the top of the list, so he crossed the line first. They will update it every lap. It is a five lap race.” We watched as the cars went around again and again until they crossed the line the last time. Car 52 had fallen to third place. I looked up at the screen to see that Car 79 crossed first. After slowing down a lot, it pulled off to the side of the track, where the other cars were parked. I saw the driver pull himself out of the window and jump down onto the dirt. He was wearing a blue jump suit and a matching helmet. When he took the helmet off his hair fell down, past his shoulders, and when he turned I realized that it wasn’t a he, it was a she. They had girls racing? I guess I never thought about it, but why couldn’t a girl do it? I sat up straighter and leaned forward, trying to see more of the woman, she looked older than me, maybe in her mid-twenties. North moved his head close to mine. “That’s Shirley Devroe. She has been racing probably for 15 years.”

I looked at North, shocked. “How old is she?”

North shrugged but said “I don’t know, maybe 26 or so.”

“She was racing out there when she was 11?” That seemed crazy, that seemed so young.

North laughed and nodded. “Yeah, they usually have a couple races a month for a 15 and younger bracket. But Shirley is good, I think I heard that she moved to this bracket when she was 14.” If Shirley and other girls could do it…

“Could I try?”

“Racing!” North practically shouted it in his surprise and he jerked his head back. I just nodded, but now I wish I hadn’t asked. Did he think I couldn’t do it? “Baby, it’s dangerous!”

“You said before it wasn’t that dangerous! Do you mean it is just too dangerous for me? I couldn’t do it?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth Baby, that’s not what I meant. It’s just…fuck Baby, why did I have to fall for someone that likes to take risks.” He put his head in his hands and let out a few more grumbles that I couldn’t understand. Did he mean that he fell for me? What exactly does that mean? I have read the phrase before in a lot of books, but it always meant the one character was in love with the other. Does North think he loves me? I wanted to say something, but I didn’t know what. Do I want him to love me? What about the other guys? Owen didn’t say anything about us loving each other, is that what he expected to happen though? Suddenly I felt a little dizzy and confused. North took his head out of his hands and looked at me. I was still paralyzed from the love thoughts that I just continued to stare at him.

“Baby, you look pale, are you okay.” His expression turned to one of concern.

“Y-you said you are f-falling for m-me?” I stuttered it out, afraid to say it and hear his response. What if it wasn’t what I thought he meant, would he laugh at me for jumping to conclusions?

I saw his eyes go wide and his shoulders sagged a little. “I’m not falling for you Baby.” It was my turn to sag, I felt deflated all of a sudden. He grabbed my hands and continued “I have already fallen for you.”

“Do you love me?” Why did I keep asking questions?

North looked pained. “I’m not supposed to tell you. Mr. B. thought it would scare you off or make you feel conflicted about the other guys.” Owen knows how North feels about me? Why would they want to keep that a secret? Am I supposed to say something back?

“Please, don’t say anything, and please don’t tell Mr. B. or anyone that I let it slip. They will be pissed. I’m sorry I let it slip Baby.”

I had to lower and tilt my head to make eye contact with him after he lowered his head. “Please don’t be sorry North Star. I’m not sorry you said it. I just don’t know what to think, I wasn’t expecting it. I’m not sure what to do.”

He lifted his head back up and pulled me closer to him in a hug. “You don’t have to do anything Baby. Just keep doing what you are doing. You don’t have to say anything you aren’t ready to say or feel and I promise I won't make you feel pressured about it. Let’s finish the races okay?”

I nodded, feeling a little better that he didn’t expect anything from me. It reminded me of what Nathan said to me when he said I had his heart. Did he mean that he loved me too? I hoped they knew what they were doing. Owen knew about Nathan, and if he knows how North feels, than this must be all ok. I smiled at North “Then can we go back to the car and kiss again?” North’s eyes widened and then grew darker.

“Yes, Baby, we can definitely do that. This is the best date ever.” I smiled and snuggled in closer to him to finish watching the races. My heart still beating fast after his confession, but I think he might be right, this date is definitely in my top seven. I still had to have my first date with Silas and Dr. Sean after all.