It ends with you (Rafe Cameron)

𝚡𝚒𝚒. 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚎

When she woke up in the morning, she felt like she was drowning. The days after that, she fought for air.

Rafe didn't visit her. The Pogues did. They called, texted, dropped by her house numerous times but Rue kept to herself. She locked herself in her room. Slept, smoked two packs of cigarettes, slept some more.

She didn't speak with a word to anyone about what happened, she told her parents she felt sick. And she did, in a way. She felt her stomach turn every time she closed her eyes. The feeling of her own hands made her skin crawl. She wanted to jump out of her body.

"Baby?" A knock on her door and her mother was inside her room before she'd answered. "One of those boys is here to see you."

Rue looked up. "Which one?" The Pogues had dropped by plenty of times, she's always send them away but it had been a week, she couldn't keep ignoring them.

"Uhm, the blonde one. I keep forgetting his name."

Rue smiled. JJ might have been the only person she could deal with right now. She nodded her head. "Tell him I'll be down in a second, let me put something decent on first."

"I'll make you two some tea." And her mom disappeared in the hallway.

Rue jumped into a shirt and a pair of athletic shorts, she couldn't be bothered to make herself look anymore presentable. She avoided looking in the mirror, her own image gave her the chills.
When she headed downstairs, her mom told her JJ was waiting for them in the greenhouse. It used to be a place for plants and flowers, but Rue's dad had turned it into a breakfast spot almost immediately after they arrived in the Outer Banks.

"I'm sorry I didn't answer your c—" she started but when the blonde boy turned she forgot her words. Rafe looked down at her, hands in his pockets. "Why are you here?" She demanded.

"I wanted to know how you were," he said the words softly. "Rue, I'm so s—"

"Don't you fucking dare apologise to me Rafe," she warned. She turned back around. She didn't need to have a conversation with him.

"Rue, please," he begged, running after her. "Please don't leave, okay." He grabbed her hand and the skin on skin contact made her insides crawl.

"Don't touch me!" She screamed.

"I'm sorry," he held his hands up in the air and then rushed them through his hair. "For all of it. I never meant to bring you into that situation, I—"

"I was nearly raped Rafe," she said the words with zero emotions, her face set like stone and she could see how it fucked with his head. He tugged at his hair, furrowing his brows.

"I know. I didn't... I never... Fuck, I never should've brought you there Rue. And I don't know what to do, I don't... I—"

"You said you'd kill him." She remembered him saying it, right before she fell into the most agonising slumber of her life. Rafe snapped his eyes at her. "Would you?"

His eyes shifted, his jaw tensed and he nodded his head.

Rue let out a breath. She forced the next movements out of herself. Stepping forward, taking his hand, bringing him to her chest and standing on her tiptoes so she could lean into his ear. "Fix yourself first before you try to fix this," she whispered and she pulled back.

Rafe stared at her. "I can't," he admitted. "I know I'm not alright. I've tried to figure it out, but I can't do it. I just can't."

Rue nodded her head in understanding. "I know."

"You don't," he gritted his teeth together. "You know what I came here for?" He asked, she stayed silent. He fished something out of his pocket. An envelope. His fingers fumbled to rip the paper open and he pulled out five twenty dollar bills. "I thought I could fix it by paying you," he threw the money on the ground. "And then I saw you and fuck I wish I'd put a bullet in that fuckers head."

Rue stared at the crumpled up pieces of paper on the ground. He'd come to pay her. A guy had assaulted her and he'd stuffed money in an envelope and driven to her house, every fiber of his being believing it was the proper thing to do until he'd laid eyes on her.

"I'll help," she said softly. His eyes snapped to her.

"Why?"

"Why? God, I don't know. Because I don't want you to end up like—"

"Your brother?" He switched. The sorrowful eyes fading to a dark blue, his jaw tensing. "I'm not some depressed junkie you need to fix Rue."

"Watch your mouth, Rafe," she warned, biting down her teeth.

"Nah, you can't save me, Rue. 'Cause there is not a damn thing to save, alright?" She saw his muscles tense. He combed his fingers through his hair, trying to calm himself down but she could see how he was getting all worked up. "I'm not a charity case for you to work on."

"I never said you were," she defended, arms crossed over her chest.

"Yeah, well you look at me like I am." He did that thing with his nose he always did when he was getting agitated. Rue had picked up on it by now. "You think with a few friendly words and pretty smiles you can fix whatever the fuck is going on in my head but you can't Rue. I'm hardwired like this, alright? I've been made to not fucking care,"

"That's not true," she tried but he rolled his eyes. "Not when it comes to me."

"Not when it comes to you," he mumbled. He'd shown he was able to care. When he'd been hurt by the words she'd said and the accusing look in her eyes that night on the beach. He'd cared enough to vow he'd kill a guy for hurting her. He cared, maybe in his own fucked up way, but Rue knew he wasn't completely derived of emotions. He could feel. "So, it's different with you. That doesn't make you special."

She deeply inhaled and then let out a long, annoyed breath. "Man, you sure are a tough cookie to crack," she groaned. "Listen up, I'm gonna be your friend, alright? That's all I wanna be, not your fucking therapist."

"I might hurt you."

"Maybe," she stared at her hands.

"I might shut you out."

She forced herself to take his hand, the skin on skin contact still an awful sensation but it grabbed his attention in the way she'd wanted it to. "If either of us ever feels like giving up on the other say this: your soul and mine," she waited for him to repeat after her but he just looked at her with his brows furrowed. "Say it!"

"Your soul and mine," he mumbled after her.

"Were destined to intertwine."

He pulled his hands away from her. "That's some lame ass shit, Rue."

"I know, but it will be our lame ass shit." A smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

"Alright, I better get going." He fished his car keys out of his pocket and Rue nodded. "Thanks," he softly said as he headed back inside the house.

"Your soul and mine, Rafe!" She called after him.

He shook his head with a soft smile. "We were destined, Rue."