From Hate To Love

❀chapter 7

Walking to class, I met Dawn and May. They were talking about our biology teacher and how scary he was. However, I couldn't get Ash's voice out of my head... "If only you knew, princess, how much he cares for you..." What did he mean? Gosh, why am I even worrying so much about this? It's not like I care about Ash or about people he knows. But what if he knows him? But wouldn't that mean Gary would know him too? I can't. This is driving me crazy. Maybe I should just forget this whole thing. It could mean absolutely nothing and I'm making a big deal out of it. Like I always do.

"Yes and he loves to send us homework!" I heard Dawn say. She hates homework but again who doesn't.

"I'm going to the bathroom really quickly kay?" I said. The two nodded at me. But before I could leave, May grabbed my wrist.

"Is everything okay?" She asked a concerned look on her face. Dawn is a bit in the back showing the same worried look.

"Don't worry. Just something in my head. I'll just go wash my face and I'll be right back"

"Okay. Call us if you need anything"

"Thanks! Love u two!"

"We love u too"

I turned around and started heading to the bathroom. My thoughts ruining like wolves in the night. Some things enter our minds and leave instantly. However, others pinch our brains so hard. They never leave. And even if at some point they do, they come back later and stronger. Making you remember every one of your decisions. every one of your mistakes or embarrassing moments. Everything comes back like waves. They never leave you alone. It's like a ghost from the past. Sometimes I wonder if someone in a very close future would create a machine to delete bad memories from our minds... Although we can't forget that bad memories and terrible experiences also make us grow. Life...

I shook my head. I should focus on something else.  However, my mind kept coming back to that silly conversation. I hate Ash. He finds a way to get in my head and in my nerves that I had no idea that it was possible.

I decided to focus on my surroundings. As I headed to the bathroom, all I could hear were my thoughts. I turned left to a corridor, only to my surprise it was even quieter. I could hear my feet hitting the ground as I walked. Silence. No sight of life. Until I turned to the right to another corridor that would lead me to the bathroom and my surprise, everyone was there. Or at least a lot of people. I wouldn't say, everyone. I could see some familiar faces like my brother and the biggest jerk on all the land.

Gary is next to... Misty? What is he doing next to Misty? Oh dear lord of all the gods. Did my brother get a girlfriend? Next to them was Ash. If I saw him without knowing him, I would have described him at that precise moment as lonely and sad. He seemed down. His eyes looking at the ground and his smile turned upside down. I have never seen someone so miserable. Nevertheless him. He's always flirting with girls or laughing... or whatever that guy does that pisses me the hell off. But now, he looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. It must be too heavy for him that's why he seems like a turtle trying to find hidden.

I felt something in me...I wanted to go there and make sure he was okay. But why? I don't like him, why would I care? He seems so vulnerable. So alone. However, how could I ever help and why should I help? He has done nothing but get on my nerves. We aren't friends. Approximately, the hate I feel for him is reciprocated because I'm sure he hates me too.  Gosh, why can't I stop staring at him, at his sad eyes?

He must have noticed me staring at him because he looked back at me. His auburn eyes meet mine. For once I thought I saw them shinning. For once I felt my heart beat faster. For once I feel drawn to him. All I wanted to do was run. In my mind, I was begging him not to approach me. I was begging myself not to feel pity for him, turn away and pretend this never happened. Even so, without realizing, I was begging for him to come to me. I was begging for his eyes to look deeper into mines. I was begging for him. I was longing for him. What was happening to me? I hate this guy... Why do I feel so nervous and happy whenever he looks at me or when he's next to me?