university, a time of confussion (love story)

chapter one.

present-

august. This is my favorite time of year. You can feel the crisp air, the crush the leaves make when you step on them in the street, and the sun gives this golden light that almost makes it look like a filter, it makes everything look better. This is my favorite time of year, school hasn't started yet, but we are usually back home from our summer vacation. This year we went to Italy of course (we go every summer to visit family), and we also went to Greece. I got this golden tan that makes me feel better about myself. Summer was fun, as usual, my big brother Sebastian invited his friends to come to the Greece portion of the vacation. I like his friends and all, but why did he have to invite him?

The him i'm referring to is Nathan. He's my brother's friend but he's also my ex boyfriend. I cant believe Seb invited him, did he really not care about me that much? I'm his sister, he's my older brother, he's supposed to protect me. I guess fraternity is more important than blood to him. It was hard having Nate around all summer, seeing him flirt with other girls in front of me in the beach, watching him get drunk and makeout with random girls in the club.

My younger sister and I didnt invite anyone, my parents let my brother invite his friends every year because they say that he's the only boy, and that gives him permission to always invite his friends. It started with one friend, and that was okay, but the last couple of years, it has been getting out of hand, he invites more and more of his friends. My parents let him do basically whatever he wants because he's the oldest. My sister and I always stick together, that's the way it has always been, Sienna and Mar against the world. Mar is 4 years younger than me, she is currently 17, but she acts my age. We are both super social people, I guess that you have to be when your last name is De Medici. Because of the family business we are always attending dinners, banquets and fancy parties.

During our time in Greece, I tried to meet new guys so I could make Nate jealous. One time we were having a Yacht party and this cute guy came to talk to me, he was actually really nice and funny, his name was Oliver. We talked and really hit it off, he had these really sparkling blue eyes, they kind of looked the exact same shade of blue that the ocean was that day. He told me he was also staying all month, we spent the whole party together. By the end of the night I was sure that I had already fallen in love with him, maybe it was the booze talking, but it really felt like he got me. His dark curly hair and bright blue eyes really got a hold of me.

After that day, we spent the rest of the trip together. I didn't care about Nate anymore, he could kiss whoever he wanted and sleep with them as well, I didn't even notice or get jealous. Hours turned into days, days turned into weeks, and as soon as I opened my eyes, summer was over. Oliver had to go back to Scotland, I had to return to Waltham, and this movie that I was living in had to come to an end. Oliver wasn't a rebound, he was more than that, of course he also saved my summer. Without him I would of been miserable, and would have had to spend time with my brother and his friends.

When Oliver and I said our goodbyes, I told him that I wasn't ever going to forget him, as cliche as it sounds, he was my first summer love. He told me that he had never met anyone like me, but I don't believe him, he is so handsome and he is also a big flirt, I don't believe that he has never met someone like me, I bet he has gorgeous and charismatic friends, at the end of the day I really dont think im special.

The night before we left I was packing in my room at the house we rented. I was really focused while I was folding my clothes into rectangles, when I heard a sound. I opened the blinds to look out to my balcony to see what was making that sound. That's when I discovered it was Oliver, he was throwing rocks at my window. That's when I got a text from him saying to meet him at the patio. I had to be careful, if my brother saw me sneaking off he would get all protective of me (I got a feeling he really didn't like Oliver). I went down the stairs and through the kitchen, I heard lots of voices coming from the living room, that's probably where all of my friends' brothers are. I opened the kitchen door that led to the patio and pool very quietly and approached Oliver. He was whispering, he said "hey", to which i responded with a simple "hey".

"I just wanted to come say goodbye the right way" he said,

"Which way is that?" I asked.

He just stared at me with those deep blue eyes, I could see the moon's reflection on them. The air was warm and I could hear the beach waves in the background. As I was staring into his eyes with my eyebrows raised, and got closer and closer, soon our noses were touching. And he kissed me, we had kissed before, but this kiss was different. It was a goodbye kiss, it was soft and reassuring, and at that moment I asked myself, how was I going to go on with my life without kissing him again after this. I was now addicted to him. The kiss got a bit more hungry and intense and that's when he stopped it. He took my face between his hands and looked at me. He then said "I wish we had more time", "me too" I said.

He held me for a couple of minutes then he left. As he was leaving he told me "I really wish you didn't live so far away, maybe then we would of had a chance. But I can't get more attached than what I already am because I know that as of right now we don't have a chance. Maybe after we both finish university our path will cross again. In the meantime I would love to keep in contact. Maybe you can come visit me and I can come visit you. You really are special, Sienna. The month that we have spent together I have gotten to know you enough to see that you don't really realise that you are what everybody else wants, you live in your own fantasy, and you feel like you're not special, but you are. You see the world in a different way. I wish I could see through your eyes. Please just take care and love yourself, I feel like you deserve it."

After that I just stared at him, I didn't say anything because I was about to cry. Why on Earth would he say that I needed to love myself more? Was he right? What did he mean when he said "you're what everybody wants"? I didn't know the answers, but I just tried to keep it off my head because if I kept thinking about it I was going to go crazy.

That was the last I saw and heard of Oliver, I've been home for two weeks and he hasn't texted or called, but as he said, we shouldn't get too attached. Maybe that was what he was trying to do. I had more important things to do anyways, like help my mom with the end of summer banquet that she throws every year. Yeah, I should stop thinking about him.. I stopped thinking about Nate but now it's Oliver I can't stop thinking about. What is wrong with me?