rain. |h.s|

11

He stares at me with a stupid look. Somehow he looks confused. Like he didn't plan this. But I'm not going to go off and say he's innocent. He's very capable of something like this.

I shoot my eyes back to Mr Jane who remains lying unconscious in my lap. Sweat falls in small streams down both mine and Mr Jane's foreheads. I frantically pull out my phone, almost dropping it in the rush. I dial 999 as fast as my fingers can tap.

"999 what's-"

"H-hello! This is Noelle Benjamin calling from station 5 in Cardiff. Uhm, I'm here with Detective Inspector Jane and he's, he's unconscious! P-please hurry." I speak faster than the lady can finish her sentence. But I don't care. I'm sweating like a pig and my heart feels like it's gonna pop out of my chest.

"Okay ma'am, just stay calm, we've sent an ambulance. Just br-"

I end the call and toss my phone to the side. I run my fingers through Mr Jane's like four hairs while I chew my lip. In the corner of my eye I can see Harry standing like a child next to their parents' bed. He obviously doesn't know what to do. Why would he? He just messes everything up. Everywhere he goes.

He infects anything he touches.

I finally take my hands off of Mr Jane and thread them in my own curls. Grease wipes off on my nails as I remove my grip on my hair. I look a Harry at last, who is of course already staring at me blankly. I blink at him, with that same angry expression.

His lips unlatch for a moment, "Noelle. I swear I thought he was safe. I-"

I rush to interrupt him. "Get away from me."

He raises his eyebrows in surprise. He clears his throat, waiting for me to go on. Does he want me to explain? I did. And he didn't like it. Then we got into this mess.

"Get. Out." I don't even look at him. My eyes are back to Mr Jane.

"Noelle I said I didn't fucking plan-" I've interrupted him so many times now.

"I said get out Harry!" I scream at him. I actually shriek at him. "And don't come back!"

He watches the words fall out of my mouth so naturally. He clears his throat again just to fill the silence. We both watch each other in completely different emotions. I'm sitting, looking up at him with all kinds of fury, and he's standing tall a few feet away, looking extremely taken aback.

I didn't know what I said until I had said it. But I meant it. I meant every single word of it. What I told him in Mr Jane's office and right now. He deserves everything that's been said to him. I was stupid to think he was a good person. I should have just admitted it when he left me with those thugs at the club a week ago. I hate him. I fucking hate him. If Mr Jane doesn't wake up, Harry better count his blessings. Whoever even gave him those, I have no clue why. I won't cover up the fact Harry's not a good person any longer. I deserve better than guessing what personality he wants to choose today.

He steps back, almost tripping over his own feet. And just like that, he rotates and heads right for the door without looking back.

I let out a large sigh as Harry exits and police car sirens wail in the distance. God where have I gotten myself? What has my life become? I never would've even dreamed that this would soon be the state of my life. I don't know what to do anymore. Should I call Harlow? It is her father after all. But I don't want to get her worked up. Cause in the end, Mr Jane is gonna be fine. Right? Yes. Yes he will... I hope.

Once the paramedics and the police finally arrive, it feels like it's been years. It feels like it's been years that Mr Jane has been lying in my lap. It feels like years since Harry walked out the door. The paramedics bust through the door and quickly hoist Mr Jane upwards from my lap. My heart is gonna explode. I can't bare this sight of him. It reminds me of that night with my mom.