rain. |h.s|

21

Noelle Benjamin

"You won't bring up my mother like that ever again. And if you do, I'll make sure you rot in that fucking institution for the rest of your life."

I can't explain what his facial expression is right now. It's in between nauseous and nervous. He looks weird. I wish I never said what I said now because this is making me more uncomfortable than the comment.

He's silent in front of me. I don't know what else to say to him. He's just standing there. What does he want me to do now? I'm done with the conversation. He looks away and half nods.

He half-nodded me.

I don't like half nods. He turns away from me and takes a seat on the couch. He turned on the stupid TV. And The Perks of Being a Wallflower is on. He's going to watch TV after all that? Are you fucking with me Harry? That speech wasn't for you to half nod and sit on the couch. It was to show you I'm done with your bullshit.

His head hasn't turned once back at me. He's actually sitting on the couch and watching TV. I want to chuck this god damn phone at him. 

"I'm going out for a bit."

Good. I want him gone. I need some time to think too. Everything happened so fast. I woke up at 6:30 and all that happened and it's still only 7:13. I'm glad I recorded with my phone too. Part of me felt there was something bound to go wrong and I'm happy I thought ahead.

I walk away from the counter with the phone in my back pocket. I want to accomplish something else today other than make any more absurd deals with Harry. I want to start my college applications. I look around for Zayn, but I can't see him anywhere around here.

I walk up the stairs as I hear the front door slam shut, indicating Harry is more than 10 feet away from me. Serenity at last. I step a toe in my room and notice Zayn sitting on my bed with his legs crossed over each other.

"Hey, I was just looking for you." I lean against the doorframe, smiling before I head towards where he's sitting.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I just didn't want to see all that again. Are you alright?"

"Oh, yeah. I'm great. Everything's worked out fine." The bed sinks when I scoot in close to him. He puts one arm around the headboard behind me and one hands me my computer. It's like he knows what I'm about to ask him.

"You wanna help me get started with my college applications?" I try to hide my smile. I can't believe whatever happened with Harry worked. I feel weird for some reason. I went from extremely giggly and happy to sobbing on the staircase, to happy again. Huh. Maybe Harry's right. Maybe we both are bipolar.

"Of course." Zayn smiles back at me and waits for me to open my computer. I honestly can't believe Harry would think Zayn wants to have sex with me. Zayn is simply just a good friend.

I exhale deeply and tuck my bottom lip in my mouth. This is all going to work out just fine. I beat him at his own game. I gave him a taste of his own medicine. I outdid him in every way possible. I win.

---

Many hours later and many college pamphlets read, Zayn leaves at about one in the morning. Harry was gone for the rest of the day. I have no clue where he went off to or with, but I wasn't very bothered. Zayn and I went out for lunch, then we came back and looked at some more schools and even talked about if I should change my major. Back in Cardiff, I majored in literature because I didn't know what else to do. Zayn agreed it was pretty basic and I should start deciding what I wanted to do. And I came to the ultimate conclusion of becoming a nurse. I know it's very random and I'm not at all prepared for it, but it seems really interesting. Plus, after hearing Zayn talk about med school, I'm excited. There are amazing med schools around here, it all works out perfectly. Only con is that I'll need an extra four years of school to get my nursing degree. But I guess it'll keep me occupied for a bit.