Sharp Flowers

Part 18

Food cooks over campfires, and warriors are happy to get the liquor pouring before the sunsets. With Ryder's force reeling from our surprise attack, this is our chance to rest and regain our energies. Everyone is so satisfied with this small victory they feel the need to boast and show off. However, I'd say we've hardly won anything. As long as Ryder still has his head, I am not ready to rest. Part of me, somewhere inside, wants to run free and shed blood. Where on Earth did that come from? Was it always in me? Or is this some new feeling born from unsettled vengeance? What does it matter anyway? I walk the woods, scouting growing shadows and watching the treetops.

"Would you-," I draw my sword and slash through the air. Sebastian leaps back, his hand over his heart.

"Don't you know better than to sneak up on an armed woman?" I scoff at him. He flashes an apologetic smile.

"I didn't think you were so tense," Sebastian explains.

"This isn't the time for a leisurely stroll," I remark.

"I wish you'd relax sometime," Sebastian suggests, "There's no need to be so formal all the time,"

"And you think you know what's best for me?" I notice earning a sharp look.

"And what if I said yes?" Sebastian counters with a sly smile. I pause my walk.

"Why I'd tell you to mind your own business," I scoff back. Goodness, he loves to poke and pester me at every chance he gets. Then he sees me irritated and smiles like that, making it hard to be mad as I should be.

"Can I ask a question?" Sebastian inquires, already asking a question, to begin with. I gawk at him, a King asking his warrior if he may have permission to say anything. I don't get him sometimes, but it makes me all the more curious.

"Go on," I accept.

"Are you okay?" he asks, and I just look at him. What does he expect me to say after everything that's led up to this point? What's worse is everything that is to come that lies untold and unknown. It feels as though I'm gripping onto life, but it's slipping through my fingers! Sebastian grimaces and tilts his head to the side. "Raven," he coos.

"Don't say my name like that. I'm fine," I assure him.

"As fine as I must be in front of every man, woman, and child. I know," Sebastian comments with a shrug. I take a deep breath and a long exhale.

"I am- exhausted," I admit and shake my head.

"From fighting?" Sebastian wonders.

"From being stuck. I want vengeance. I want freedom but-," I start but go wordless with Sebastian quietly listening. I want a life of my own that I define. Wrenwood warriors were leaders, fighters, and politicians. I thought pouring my soul into fighting as they did was where I belonged- it is where I should be. Yet something doesn't feel right.

"Raven, whatever it is that has you trapped, cannot obligate you. Of all people to be bound by some obligation- you are the last person. I can't imagine anything could stand in your way," Sebastian tells me, leaving me quietly stunned. I suppose I should thank him, but I can't find words and I think I'm turning beet red.

"Y-you didn't come all that way out here- here, just to tell me that um," I stammer and start walking again with Sebastian following.

"No, not just to tell you that," Sebastian agrees, and I find his hand slipping around mine. The sleeves of his dark cloak drape over our hands, cool against mine.

"I was planning on coming back," I scoff, with my lips twitching up into a smile.

"But people talk when I come by. They'd bother you or makeup stories," Sebastian notes.

"Won't they make up worse if they notice we both have disappeared?" I suggest, and Sebastian raises his brows. He gives my hand a slight squeeze.

"Now, that might make seeing you a little more difficult," Sebastian complains, and I can't stifle a giggle fast enough. Goodness, is that what this was about?

"You are King Kisomen," I point out and laugh at myself for reminding the man of his own name.

"Doesn't matter. You are whoever you are, whatever you want to be," Sebastian starts, his voice trailing into a soft murmur, and he drops his eyes. I stop again to catch his eyes again. "And you could stay that way with me," he mumbles.

"With you. Are you-," I start to ask when Sebastian spins me around and pulls me back against himself.

"All I ask of you is just you. No need to be any noble or warrior on the field. I just want you as you are," Sebastian promises.

"You ask for nothing else?" I wonder.

"Nothing," Sebastian whispers back, letting his chin graze the top of my head. He wraps his arms around me a little tighter, holding on like he's afraid to let go. Honestly, I almost don't want him to let go. This moment feels secure yet surreal. "I love you as you, not what you represent," he adds.

"You are remarkably careless," I laugh.

"You see carelessness, and I call it honesty. Like this right now. Being alone means, we don't have to uphold appearances. It's just you and me," Sebastian reminds me.

"Honesty, huh," I mumble. I suppose better would come from honest emotions. Looking back over my shoulder up at Sebastian, he notices with a faint smile. If this is what honesty feels like, I think I like it when I reach up and feel the side of his face under the hood of his cloak.

"All I am is all I represent, but with you, I am just Sebastian," Sebastian says and pecks me on the forehead. Goosebumps rise on my arms, and chills run down my back. He laughs under his breath and pulls me aside.

"What are you-," I wonder. We step into the cool shade of a thicker forest tree, where Sebastian drops the hood of his cloak. I stare, unused to Sebastian's face in the morning daylight, before he gives a gentle kiss upon my lips.