The Blinding Light of Sunrise - TNT Duo Dream SMP AU Fanfic

Chapter 2

Quackity sat at his desk staring at the pen in his hand as he absently fidgeted with it. F-ck! Hadn't he known it could happen? Hell, he'd even planned what he would do if Wilbur got that goddamned look in his eye like he'd seen when he visited the first time. How he'd just grin and step away from him and tell him to get the f-ck out of his city. But that hadn't f-ing happened, had it? No, it f-ing didn't. And what pissed him off the most was how he'd practically jumped up to meet Wilbur's lips the second that tender look flashed in Wilbur's eyes.

Was he that f-ing desperate?!

He dropped his pen and let his forehead fall into the palm of his hand, his black hair sliding through his fingers. Why had he done it? What was it about bad people with power that got him off? First Eret, then Schlatt. Well, he thought with mild amusement, Wilbur doesn't have power. Not anymore. He was nothing, a nobody. Less than nobody, at least nobodies were ignored. He was hated, friendless. He could barely run a sh-tty burger stand. But he was a bad man. There was no f-ing doubt about that.

Sapnap wasn't either of those things. He probably could have had power, he was strong enough and well liked. He kind of did with the Kinoko Kingdom or whatever George had called it. The kingdom he and Karl and George had made without him. They hadn't even bothered to tell him. Karl was supposed to have told him? What a f-ing joke of an excuse that was! They all knew Karl's memory was sh-t. Hadn't they even bothered to ask Karl what he'd said, why he wasn't there? Sapnap said he loved him so much, more than even Karl, and never once did he think during all that time they were planning and building to f-ing ask if he wanted to come? To invite him to visit?! To visit him!? No! In all that f-ing time, they hadn't even given him a passing f-ing thought! For all their words about loving him, they'd forgotten him so easily!

His fingers absently moved the two gold rings around his ring and pinky fingers. Their rings.

And that's what f-ing hurt the most! At least with Schlatt and Eret he knew where he stood, that it was his usefulness to them and their usefulness to him that formed the foundation of their relationship. It was something tangible that could be influenced and changed. But Sapnap and Karl... that was supposed to have been real! It was f-ing REAL to him! And they'd forgotten about him! Like he was nothing!

He squelched both wrists against the tears stinging his eyes. As he wiped the back of his hands across his face he felt the cold metal of the four rings against his cheek.

And now he'd let another man into his bed and his heart. No, not his heart. It wasn't love or anything. He'd just been f-ing lonely. Wilbur filled a need, that was all. It was just a meaningless f-ck. Guys were supposed to be able to have meaningless sex, right? No strings attached. He didn't love Wilbur, it wasn't love, not for him, his heart was too broken and battered to do that anymore. He didn't think he could fall in love again, even if he wanted to, even with the right person... But maybe it had been something for Wilbur... He could still close his eyes and see the softness in Wilbur's eyes when he'd kissed him that last time.

So what if it had? So f-ing what?! It wasn't like he owed him anything. Wilbur was a grown man, he could handle a little heartbreak. Hell! If anyone deserved to have his heart broken it was Wilbur f-ing Soot! He'd broken everyone else's. Why should he care what Wilbur felt? F-ck him.

Quackity opened the bottom drawer of his desk and pulled out a bottle and a shot glass. He poured himself a shot and gulped it down. Four gold rings glinted at him from above the glass.

F-ck it all!

He threw down the glass and heard it shatter on the floor. He grabbed the bottle and downed a large swig.