Dilemma ( Discontinued )

Chapter 7

I was infront of the mirror admiring myself in red colour saree. I looked gorgeous as if a new bride awaiting for her groom. Afterall it was a special gift from him. It feels like a fantasy the day we exchanged rings giving our relationship the oneness of infinite. I wore my jimki and necklace specially selected by my life partner. I let my hair down in nature wavy the way he always loved. With some foundation, lip gloss and kajal I finished my light make-up. Even without those I had my pregnancy glow. My light brown eyes got highlighted with the black iconic underlines. My bangles and anklet created ginglings which was so soothing along with the chirping birds at our window. I was taking my perfume when two strong arms encircled my little 3 months bumped tummy. I slowly looked at his reflection without surprise since I sensed him coming.

"Happy wedding anniversary, Pondati." he whispered in a honey smooth voice nuzzling my neck. I giggled with the ticklishness it brought. I turned to buried my face in his chest, my safest hideout. After some good minutes still being in his hold I looked above and whispered "Thank you." he slowly bumped his head with mine smiling and gave a tender kiss on my forehead. He wore the Red cotton shirt and sandal pant, matching me. We stood there like few minutes in warmth of our embrace purely out of love.

We invited Kalidas and some of his colleagues. Our house was filled with my tuition students and their families. It was too fun than we literally imagined. We cut the cake and enjoyed our wedding day with everyone.

We retired for the night when everyone left giving their blessings. But sleep didn't show mercy on my tired body. The same fear of all pregnancy women who love their husbands terribly engulfed me. He didn't snore so still not asleep. I slightly came out off his sheltered hold and poked his velvety cheeks. He hummed opening his almond eyes. He was always cautious at nights since the moment we confirmed we were expecting. I sighed in worry twisting his button. I knew he could see my face and the bother in it clearly in the moonlight. "Do you love her/him more than me?" I could sense his confusion comprehending my blabbers. "Huh?" he asked holding my nape to have my gaze on him. "Me or him/her, who do you love more?" Once he got it he laughed in quiet and I glared. Only a woman could get that fear of sharing love. A orphan woman like me could feel that pain much more. He slowly held my chubby face and stroked my cheeks making me pur in delight.

"You are my first love, wife and my everything. I value you more than anyone, anyone." he told the same line which he told that day. I buried my face in his chest. Remembering that day I slept that night.

"No, it wasn't. I know you didnt mean that kiss. I didn't take it serious either. We are still friends, don't worry." saying that I moved towards kitchen. Because the words I just spilled felt cruel to my heart in every possible way.

I poured the milk from the bottle delivered by Shiva Anna, our street milk man. I boiled the milk. I kept the coffee bottle at the kitchen counter. Preparing the aromatic coffee like a robot with my soul wandering somewhere when I turned with 2 cups he was behind startling me but the coffees were safe. He got one cup from me. While doing so his finger subtly touched mine making me shiver. I couldn't even look at his face.

We stood opposite in the kitchen sipping the coffee silently looking at the crow near my window asking for anything to eat.

Finishing it when I was about to keep the cup in sink he came inbetween. Our hands touched but I didn't retreat neither him. Slowly he held my hand and interwined our fingers making myself shudder. I didn't protest when he held me by nape making my hair stand. His cold fingers caressed my jawline when I bit my lips. He slowly tilted me with his thumb to look into his eyes. It was again a slip of emotion, even worst the lust. I hurriedly got out of his hold and turned to go.