Not Your Average Girl

Preview

  It's only on days like this where I can be normal.

  I stared dully at myself in the bathroom mirror, examined the purplish bruise where the hardened crust of the pie had struck the hardest. I had washed the pie away as soon as I had stepped into my dark home, and stood under the warm spray for almost an hour. It was Friday. The only day where there would be a short amount of time that They would be gone.

  Y/N. That was the name given to me. It was a curse. A godforsaken title, a malediction, a failure. I didn't know what it meant. I didn't know why it had been given to me either. But I knew that it wasn't my birth name. Because once upon a time, that rotting corpse down there in the kitchen had a loving wife and a complete family that I was a part of. I belonged. And it was a time so long ago, before so many scenarios and so many boys, that I had been normal.

  How long has it been? I recalled countless universes, where my mother had taken my father's place. Where she had been the one alive and drunk, while my dad was six feet under in cold, rotten soil. Worlds where I came from an orphanage, knowing neither love nor sympathy, only to have my frozen heart thawed by a singular boy. Timelines where I could either choose this nameless boy over the other. Do whatever I wanted, whether it was killing, drinking, abusing drugs- there would be no repercussions. Because this name given to me, Y/N, was someone perfect and pretty and someone everyone loved blindly.

  That had all changed once I was callen here. Bestowed upon me had been the familiar blonde hair and ocean eyes, and I had hated every second of the monologue that They had inserted into my head. I'd expected roughly the same thing- bad boy one, childhood friend 2, rich guy 3, and kindred boy 4. But that hadn't happened this time. Even though my heart had been scripted to flutter at their touch, I still found them repulsive deep down.

  On Wednesday, all of that had been reduced to splinters.

  Somehow, I wasn't loved. Arlean and Rain had been a couple for as long as I remembered. Maybe we had even been friends once. I don't remember any of it, but I'm sure that every single boy I had collided with up to now- we were once friends. But there was no point dwelling on that. Now everyone hates me. And it wasn't even a delusion casted upon my fragile mind.

  I could accept that. It was better than being loved unconditionally.

  I looked at myself in the foggy mirror once more. Saw a shell. An empty, soulless husk ready to be dominated any second.

  I was ready to let all of it go. And when my time comes, I can only hope for it to be permanent.

  With that last thought, I could already feel the probing tentacles of Them once again prodding at my head. Tearing away at my sanity.

  Sleep. And attend Rain's party at 8:00 p.m tomorrow.

  I didn't fight back. There wouldn't be any point.