The Pain Will Gradually Diminish Through This Poem

To Mr Writer

To Mr. Writer,

                     Hey, my writer, my poet, my admirer, my everything. It’s been four long months since you confessed your feelings for me. It’s been a very long long month since you showed me all your feelings. You also wrote a letters for me which is I appreciated so much because I am dreaming to have someone who’ll give it to me, and I know I have said it a lot of times already, but I am really really really grateful to have you in my life. Whenever you are making me read all those poems you’ve written for me, I can’t help but to smile and giggle because this is my very first time to receive those sincere poems with deep meanings, I cannot tell you what I feel whenever you are sending me those well-crafted poems because I don’t want you to misunderstood all of my actions. But Mr Writer, I do appreciate all of those! You have no idea of how much I loved all of your masterpieces!

       I feel so special when you dedicate your one story for me, I know it wasn’t easy to create and write a story but you never hesitate to dedicate it for me, you made me the happiest girl alive since you came to my life. I am so sorry for making you confuse about my actions, I’m sorry for giving you a hard times when it comes to my feelings, I am really sorry for not getting into the point where I should’ve confess my feelings. I can’t tell it to you yet because I ain’t sure, darling. When I started to read your story that is inspired by me, I can’t help but to feel sad, happy, excited, disappoint, and feel loved. I felt different kind of emotions because the way you wrote all of it is indeed a heartfelt!

        I feel sad when I’ve done reading the middle part of the story, because you’re downing yourself and you are comparing yourself to HIM. Please, do not compare yourself and down yourself because of him, we are all different. We are all unique. I ain’t sure if your jealousy was all true, but if it is, I am sending you my sincere apologies, I didn’t know that you loved me enough to feel those jealousy and insecurities just because I love someone else.

      Mr Writer, it’s been a month since everything became blurry, I didn’t know if how will I open my eyes again after upon realizing that you get tired and you are slowly losing your feelings for me. I am very sorry for going through the point where you decided to stay away from me, I am so sorry for all. I thought when you turned your back on me, it was already the last time to be with you... but I am so glad when you started to look back again, you cameback! I am so happy. I can’t express my feelings when you are around but trust me, being with you is like being in a cloud where you can find peace.

         I thought everything will be good already, but I was taken a back when you are already the one who pushed me away. Mr Writer, why are you doing this to me? Why are you pushing me away? Why are you begging me to get out of your life? Are you really that tired? Do you wanna really let your feelings go? You are so scared of losing me... but where did you find the courage to pushed me away? Maybe because you have done enough, maybe because you are so tired of writing something that you felt like it is nonsense to me. Maybe because you don’t want me to be a part of your poetry anymore. Maybe because you really want me to get out of your life already...

      My writer, they are all right. All the regrets are flowing whenever it is too late and whenever the person is not with you anymore, because when you totally vanished, when you pushed me away, that was the moment I knew that it was you. It’s already you...

And it is so freaking hard to accept the fact that it’s too late.

The girl that used to be your persona and character,
         —K