and then there i was
on my side
shaking, staring into this quiet sort of nothingness
my little phone speaker desperately trying to fill the room with music
to make the space whole again
this sort of liquid gold is delivered to me
and with one sip i feel relief
with that taste i am okay
i am cold and also hot and shaking and sad;
miserable
but now i am calm
like someone caught in a devastating tornado, i find solace within the disaster
no more waiting for what is lost,
worrying for how it is
i simply just am
i exist . i exist.
and suddenly that speaker seems to emit the sound so much louder
it fills up the room; fills my head
with the lovely sounds that previously made me so hollow
and suddenly i remember
that the quiet is good
that my brain can quiet in the silence as well;
peace isn't so far away
