Matias Ruiz: It's Who I Am

Chapter 4 - A Silent Break

The year 2013 came to and end and 2014 had started. Many of you know that the better days can't last forever and as a matter of fact nothing last forever. That's just life. The days of extreme happiness began to fade. The people who were there to support left. I didn't understand what was happening and began to feel alone. I saw that many YouTube subscribers started to unsubscribe to my channel. The smiles on the viewers faces were no longer alive. Everything was going downhill from here. The more I sat and thought about all this the more confused I would get. One night in July I sat up all night and thought about everything. I asked myself "What did I do along the way?" I didn't know how to answer my own thoughts but I knew they were true. I had changed and that is what made people leave. I started to take it all as something I had to do to get famous. I wanted to be heard. My desire to be who I wanted to be took the best of me and made me something I never wanted to become. I was the kid who was doing it for the fame. I had changed. I tried to tell myself it wasen't true and that I was still the same kid with the passion but in reality I knew I wasen't that kid anymore I was growing up and wanted fame more than smiles. I couldn't handle that so I did all I could in my power to change that and get myself back up. I started to write more music and songs. I started to share them with the world. A few months later I deleted my YouTube channel and knew I had to earn the right to be known as the kid who did it for his love to music and making videos. I let everything go. The YouTube channel had about thirteen thousand views on 3 videos overall and I deactivated that account to start MatiasRuizTV which is the current channel I recently started. I went without uploading anything for the whole year of 2014. I basically disappeared from social media to put work into a project to show what I had gone through and felt during that time. I wrote about a total of 90 songs and I later went through the long process of narrowing those 90 songs down to 6. I was working on an EP. I never really gave much information about that until December of 2014. I revealed that I would be releasing one last work with music Called "The Last Time EP" with six original songs. This was because I wanted to change. I wanted to be myself again. That time I took off from all social media and music was very useful to me because found myself again. I had some struggles with myself during this time and experienced some of the most shocking things in my life. I feel like during this time alone I fell in love. I had never really known what the word love actually meant until this time of my life. The feeling that you may be alone with nobody to lend a helping hand is scary right? Believe me I went through 6 consecutive months alone until a beautiful girl came into my life and decided she was willing to take her time to help me rise back up. She did that not just to help me but because she knew that the fan base was split apart and needed me back up on my feet again. She helped me find the real reason for my success in the first place. I was restored on my thoughts and knew what I wanted to do with this. I started to work my way back up on my own emotional ladder. The life I had gone through was rough and caused some major damage to my mental state of mind. I guess you could call this a remarkable new start.