there is so much sadness and anger toward myself and the world,
and i don't know how to let it out anymore.
the screaming doesn't work.
the crying has made my eyes so puffy that it hurts to close them.
what do i do?
i am lost.
i am stuck.
i am falling back into a deep dark hole as time passes by,
and all i want to do is save myself.
but i can't.
i can't find the strength or hope anymore.
it all left me,
just like everyone and everything good.
it is just me.
just me in the dark with my computer filled with people i don't know,
who i write to as if i know them.
what am i doing anymore?
isn't there someone there to grab me and tell me it'll be ok?
i have tried hugging myself too by the way... and it hasn't done much.
so what now?
i guess i will hold myself up as long as i can.
everything is work out eventually.
