you left me first...

{ goodnight }

Mattheo's POV

"Ayy mate" Nott whisper shouted across the table. I looked to see who was speaking and my eyes were met with his.

"Me and the others are gonna go to my dorm and drink you wanna come?" He asked me. I thought about it for a second. It didn't take long for me to make my mind up.

"Yeah sounds good" I responded.

"Cool well, we're leaving now so get up" Nott and the others got up from the table and started to walk to the doors. I got up and followed them. I looked around at the other people at the table and made eye contact with Y/N. After a second she snapped out of it and quickly turned away blushing. I rolled my tongue in my mouth and smirked.

I had got into drinking when I was about 13. Before that, I'd had a few sips of alcohol at Y/N's house. Back then I thought it tasted like shit. After a while, though it was sort of all I had. I tried for a while to stop but I just couldn't do it.

We walked to Nott's room. Laughing and talking along the way. Once we got to the Slytherin common room we sprinted to Nott's dorm. We went in and he started to go through his drawers and look under his bed. A few minutes later he had pulled out about 6 bottles of fire whiskey. Nott had a huge smile on his face along with me and the others.

"Who's ready to get wasted" Questioned Nott.

*************

Y/N POV

I saw Mattheo leave the great hall with Nott and his friends. I almost wanted to go and tell him that they're assholes and that they're probably not a great choice in friends. But then I remembered we're not friends so why bother. I would only get a cocky reply from him, like 'Oh you're worried about me now' or 'Jealous that I'm making new friends. The point is it would be a waste of time.

Pansy was still talking about the party on Friday. She was really excited about it. I guess I was too but not like she was. I would normally get pissed and wake up with a major headache. This is why we started holding the parties on Friday. It gave everybody a few days to cool off before they had classes again.

"Alright so Y/N we were thinking of getting fire whiskey, beer and vodka. Do you think we should get more?" Asked Pansy. I had been daydreaming so I wasn't really paying attention to most of the conversation.

"Um yeah, sounds good. Maybe some wine though and a few other bottles. Muggle stuff is pretty good some of that might be alright" I responded. My father had a huge collection of wine. Some of it was wizarding stuff but most was from the muggle world. Even though he hated muggles he would say that nobody made alcohol quite like them.

"Ok cool, I'll try to find somebody who can hook us up"

"Don't worry I can get it" I replied while getting up from the table. 

"You heading off?" 

"Yeah, I'm just really tired" 

"Night then" 

"Night" 

The boys didn't notice me get up and leave. They were having a very heated discussion about quidditch like usual. 

************

Mattheo's POV

I stumbled out of Nott's dorm. I couldn't remember anything that had happened just that I had drunk a lot. Trying to find my way back to my dorm while drunk was not easy. I ran into several walls and tried to go into several other peoples dorms. I managed to find Blaise and Draco's and hoped that they could help me but they weren't there. 

I continued to struggle down the hallway. I was about to give up and lay on the floor but then I heard the common room door open. I looked to the door and saw Y/N walk in. Right, when we made eye contact I collapsed on the floor. Just as I had almost fallen asleep I felt an arm pull me up. I tried my best to cooperate not caring who it was. When I opened my eyes I saw Y/N with her arm around my shoulders. 

She held on to me and led me up the stairs toward the dorms. It wasn't long till we stopped in front of a door. I had left it open just in case I was too drunk to get in which I was. Y/N pushed the door open with her foot and walked me inside. When I made it to the bed I fell forward onto it. I heard the door shut again so I assumed she had left. 

But when I heard the tap running I knew she was still there. I heard her walk out of the bathroom and walk over to the bed. I turned my head to the side to see she had placed a glass of water and a little white tablet on the bedside table. 

"Water and a painkiller. It's not much but It'll help a bit" 

I didn't say anything just sat up and reached for the glass. I also grabbed the small pill and swallowed it with the water. Y/N was sitting on a chair at my desk. I put the glass down and settled back into bed. She watched me settle in again before getting out of the chair and walking towards the door. 

************

Y/N POV 

I know how much he pissed me off but I still didn't like seeing him in this state. It reminded me of my dad and what it was like seeing him coming home drunk. I would always look after him and get him food or make sure that he was comfortable. Then he left and I realised what a waste of time it was. I didn't want to see Mattheo wind up like my dad or my brother. He was a good person he just didn't realise it. 

I slowly twisted the door handle around and was about to walk out when I heard a faint word come from the bed. 

"Goodnight Y/N" 

I turned to look at the bed and saw him with his head buried into the pillow. He looked just like the little boy who I had met all those years ago. A small smile formed on my face. I turned around and stepped out of the dorm. I glanced back one last time before pulling the door shut. 

The walk to my dorm was short but it was cold so it made it seem like some long journey. The others still weren't back. I was guessing they had gone off to smoke somewhere meaning they wouldn't be back for a little while. 

When I got back to my dorm I had a quick shower and then changed into a pair of shorts and a singlet. I turned off all the lights and laid down in my bed. The sound of rain pattered on the windows and I could hear the very faint laughter of kids in the common room. 

I laid there for a minute or two when a single tear rolled down my cheek. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. Burying my head down. It wasn't too long before I fell asleep leaving today in the past. 

************

A/N

Even though I know nobody is reading this I'm still gonna add in authors notes for myself as if I'm writing these for other people. So yeah :)