Love To Leave You

Part 1.

"you know how scared I was that you were gonna leave me again...But I stayed anyways because I love you too much?"

"Oh is that so?"

"Yes it is so."

"I do not know what you want me to say to you right now"

"Anything... literally anything"

"Well you shouldn't have."

Those were the last words we exchanged....the last time we ever spoke...that was 1 year ago and the words still echo in my mind.

"Miss James...I'd appreciate if you were actually here during my lessons?"

Oh yeah...I was in my English lecture...forgot about that.

"Yes sorry sir...won't happen again"

He nodded and got back to his lesson on how Pride and Prejudice was possibly the most controversial piece of art he'd ever set his eyes on.

This had become a daily occurrence...me totally spacing out thinking about this conversation...over and over again until I have not clue what is going on around me.

He left me broken.
In every sense of the word...there was literally no other way to explain it other than broken.

Two hours had finally passed and the lecture was finally over...thank goodness.
I always felt like I was going to suffocate in that class.. I mean sure I loved English but all we ever talked about was stuff I already knew...so the class wasn't interesting for me at all.

I got to my car and sat inside for a minute...trying to gather my thoughts...it was always the same thing over and over again.
I'd wake up, go to my classes ,get in my car and go home, eat junk  and I'd repeat the whole process all over again the next day...

It was beginning to take its toll...living like this couldn't be healthy...it just couldn't be...but this way the way it had been for the past year or so...so I was used to it.

I put the car into drive and started heading home...it was going to be a 20 minute drive...during which I'd be blasting Benson Boone at the highest volume until I got home....
Honestly speaking he's probably what got me through my break up...his music had a way of making me feel my emotions...although I'd end up crying half the time, it still felt good.
I pulled into the parking space just as Ghost Town started to play...I got out and headed up to my apartment.

I lived alone...the apartment wasn't too shabby but it wasn't the best place either.
I got it through my mom's friend who allowed me to live here on a student discount, so rent wasn't too bad...I got a monthly allowance from my parents to help
out with it...but  I'd started to look into getting a job soon.

I opened my refrigerator only to find that there wasn't anything inside...shocker.
I decided I needed to get some groceries...I needed to stop living on take out and junk.

There was a convenience store about 5 minutes away if I walked, so I decided to go there...It was already 7 pm so most stores would be closed by now.

I put in my earpods and took my wallet and keys and headed out the door...the fresh air might do me some good.

I got to the store and started shopping for basics...just enough to last me a week then I could go shopping for proper food...for now I'd settle for some eggs, milk, bread...the simple stuff.

After I was done paying, I went to self check out and left the store with my plastic bag...there wasn't much so it wasn't too heavy.

About two minutes away from my apartment...I started to get the inkling feeling I was being followed.

At first I didn't pay much mind to it..but when I couldn't focus on the music playing in my earpods I took them off and started to look at my surroundings.

I couldn't see anything amiss, so I kept walking.
As soon as I took a step, I heard a twig snap behind me and I quickly turned...I immediately froze.

There was a figure standing about 4 meters away from me...wearing what seemed to be a tweed jacket and jeans, as well as a cap.

I turned around and started walking faster, praying I made it to my apartment as soon as possible.