I Care (Frerard Oneshot)

I Care

They left.

Everyone left.

I was so stupid and rude that I made everyone leave.

I pushed everyone that tried to help me away.

I said rude things that I didn't mean and can't take back.

I can't go back and apologize because they won't forgive me.

They'll yell at me and remind me of what I did to them.

They'll say rude things and push me away like I did to them.

I didn't really mean those things, it was the drugs and alcohol taking over me.

I didn't really want them to leave, it was the drugs and alcohol that told them too.

I just want everyone to forgive me.

I sat on my living room couch remembering everything I did wrong. The thoughts just built up in my head reminding me of how stupid I am. Your so stupid. Everyone left because of you. They all hate you and they'll never return. Do them a favor and kill yourself.

The living room of my apartment was littered with alcohol bottles, some broken from my fit not even ten minutes ago. Alcohol was like a river on my wooden floor.

Cocaine was like snow on my coffee table. Covered almost every inch of it.

Needles empty and some full of heroine lie on top of the cocaine.

I don't know how many needles I injected or how many lines of cocaine I did but I didn't care.

I took another gulp of my Jack Daniels and stared at the wall in front of me. Worthless piece of shit.

SMASH!

Another full bottle wasted from me throwing it against the wall.

I reached down in my pack and pulled out another one, popping it open and gulping it down.

I was angry at myself and the world because of what I've done, mostly myself.

I picked up my cell phone and unlocked it. No texts or calls.

Why would I have any, everyone hates me. Because your nothing. No one loves you, no one cares. They wouldn't even notice if you died.

I looked through my contacts contemplating on whether or not I should call my brother Mikey. Maybe he'll forgive me and help me out of this dark hole I have myself in. Doit. He'll just laugh in your face and hang up. He'll laugh at the situation you put your self in. Look at you. Sitting on your couch drinking and doing drugs like there's no tomorrow. Your pathetic.

I grumbled something I couldn't even understand and threw my phone against the wall in front of me. It broke into two pieces and landed in alcohol. "Guess I'm getting a new phone tomorrow." I mumbled to myself. If you make it threw the night.