Wading In Deep Water

Chapter Three

"Do you have to be an egotistical narcissist 24'7?"

"Don't be jealous Hun, not everyone can be as confident and fit as I am." I roll my eyes.

Kai and I were walking to down to the pier for lunch but for the past five minutes Kai had had two freshmen girls following his every move. The biggest thing that turned me off about Kai was that no matter how sincere and kind he was to others he was always full of himself. He eluded this confidence that was quite overpowering at times and he would just tell me that "one could not love, until one truly loved themselves." I thought it was a bunch of BS but it was like his religion, almost his faith. I guess I just never understood that.

"Okay girls," Kai turns around and directly calls out the giggling idiots. "I'd really love some alone time with my friend, if you don't mind." The girls stop and blush in utter embarrassment. They run back towards the building.

"Better?" He sighs. I look at him and turn away crossing my arms.

"Kai, sometimes I wish you were average, you're just too pretty."

"Wow, I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or a jab." Kai pushes his hair out of his face and a little shiver runs down my back.

"Seattle what's up with you? Lately you've been looking at me really weird?"

I stop. Maybe this was my chance. Maybe this was my time. Maybe he'd say it back they way I wanted to hear it.

"To be honest, Kia I think..." I stop, Kia has gotten extremely close to me.

"What Sea?" He pulls me in by the waist.

I can feel the warmth radiating off him and my eyes begin to trail down the curves and edges of his face. I examine the way his eyes fall in a lazy way almost as if he'd fall asleep any minute. I follow the sharp jaw line that starts under his ear and slowly traveled down his dark skin.

"Uh, it just lately..." He's staring at me. I'm literally about to confess myself but I can't. Not when his deep green eyes are looking at me like this.

"What" He whispers, leaning in. That's it. I was so done. Before I know it I move closer filling the gap that once separated our mouths and I pull him in for a kiss. A deep long kiss that reminded me of home. A kiss I could forever linger in because I knew it was finally safe. Kai wraps his arms around my waist even tighter and I can feel the space between us basically disappear. Our lips move together almost like a dance. A synchronized routine expect every move felt like something new; something I never felt before. A kiss foreign kiss from a childhood sweetheart. It felt so different that I wanted more of it. I wanted to bask in this kiss for hours. Knowing that it belonged to Kia only made me swoon even more.

"YO KAI!"

We pull away. We pull away from the wonderful moment of bliss.

"Oh my god." I whisper, pushing the hair out of my face.

"Kai! Dude Coach is looking for you!" Some random kid from Kia's soccer team was standing at the end of the block impatiently waiting for him.

Kai quickly looks over his shoulder and shouts "Hold on!"

"I can't believe we just.." I say pacing.

"I know" He stands there awkwardly looking at me, as if I had some kind of unsaid answer or solution to this kiss.

"This changes everything. I mean we just crossed the line of friendship, Kai." I began to feel a little panicked. Did I just fuck everything up?

"Kai!" The kid shouts again.

"I'll be there in a second!" I can see Kai's getting frustrated and I can't tell if it's from the annoying jock or the incident we just had. Kai turns to me and takes my hand. I start to freak. This didn't look good. I would have taken anything to get out of this moment. "Look Seattle, I don't think we should do this."

I pull my hand away. Kai rarely used my full name. I knew it. I should have never done it. I should have know that Kia would never go for his best friend. I turn away and start walking. I can feel tears welling up. But I push them back. I refuse to cry over a boy, let alone my best friend. Kia runs up to my side and I try to speed up. "Seattle don't do this. We need to talk I know that but not now. Not here!"

"Whatever!" I try not to look at him because I don't want to see what he's really thinking.

"Kai! Dude you're going to get us both in trouble if you don't come now!"

Kai ignores his teammate and continues to follow me. "Come on Seattle. Promise me you'll talk later. I need to talk to you later!"

I come to a halt and spin around. "Fine! We'll talk later. But I already know what you're going to say." By this point tears are falling down my face like rocks in avalanche. And I already have the image. It plays through my head every day. Like a bad song on repeat.

"Kai I know you just want to be my friend and that you love me but I don't know if I can stand being in love with you and continue hiding it." I look Kai dead in the eyes and I can see him in complete distraught.

"Oh, sea. Honey listen I do lov-"

"KAI!"

Kai closes his eyes and rubs his hands through his hair. "Ahhh!" He kicks the curb. "Listen Seattle after practice I'm going to come straight to your house and we're going to figure this out. Okay?" I nod too drained to say a word.

I wipe my tears as I watch Kai lean in again. A small gasp escapes my mouth and a little part of me prays that he's going in for another kiss but instead he plants a small one on my forehead and turns around running back the school.

"Seattle I love you!" 

Yeah, but not the same wayI love you Kai, not at all.