As The Mill Grinds

RESTORATION CHAPTER 17

It was out there no turning back now. Nadine made up her mind this was it. She had to confirm it. "It's true, he is your father."

Everyone gasped shocked at her declaration. Zack turned slowly to the man standing astute, not looking left not right, just straight forward.

'What is he waiting for?' Kai asked himself, waiting for a loud out burst and endless questions. He clenched his jaws so hard until the pain from the force made him wince. He folded his fist and released his jaws and dug his nails into his palms. He knew what was coming next: the same rejection, the same ignoring, that longing that would never be filled. Pointing fingers, hatred and deserving ridicule was all he waited for, and then... 'W...what? W...Why did he? Is this, is this even right?'

Zack threw his arms around Kai almost squeezing the air from him in his grasp. Kai stiffened at first not knowing what to do, not sure if to reciprocate this warm and welcoming embrace.

"Dad" Zack's words came as a whisper as the end of a deep sigh.

'What was this?' This was something new, he never felt nothing like it. A wave, no a rush, no an explosion, yes that was it. An explosion of emotions erupted from the depth of his belly. Nothing, he felt nothing in eighteen years, he felt nothing. Not even when his mother died could he cry nor felt sad. He didn't believe he had a right to show any emotions, other than the cold emotionless bitterness that resided with him for eighteen years. His knees felt weak, it all seemed to melt away. His armour disintegrated at the words 'Dad' and he closed he eyes, welcoming the flow of it all. He wrapped his arms around his son and allow new emotions to take over. For the first time his own heart betrayed him as tears stung his eyes and gathered as pools under the lids. He tried hard to blink them back, but was defeated when they were too much and streamed down his cheeks.

Their hug was joined by Nadine, then Josh, then Cara and other until, well Casey stood there watching the huge group hug that filled the dining room, then her voice broke everything.

"I know I don't understand much and probably made a fool of myself, but I think it's a good thing you're my brother, I guess. I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable. I hope you can forgive me Zack.

The group parted and Zack stepped forward. He bent down to her and drew her in for a hug. "It's all good, you still have a lot to learn little sis."

She pushed him off in a huff. "Little sis?!" Casey looked at him with wide eyes.

"Yes, it's little sis." Josh reiterated with a smuck grin, "he's much, much older than us." Josh stood next to Zack and pointed a finger up at him. A smile teased the corners of his lips as he waited for her to throw another tantrum as per usual.

Casey just smiled wearily, "I'll be in my room if anyone wants me. Uh...welcome to the family Zack." She shook her head and walked off bewildered.

"I'll let you know when it's time to eat." Nadine said after her, but Casey just kept head straight and walked down the hall.

"She will be ok right? I mean it's a lot to take in, even for me." Zack watched as Casey waded off.

Josh pinched his own leg trying to defuse his laughter. He knew his sister well enough. He knew she would try to avoid Zack like a plague after throwing stunts like that. It was all too satisfying for him. He dragged Zack by the elbow to the dinner table. "Come sit here Zack." Josh pulled him next to him.

Zack was glad that a least one of his new siblings still wanted him around. His mind drifted back to his parents who were probably still at home running the streets and knocking on every neighbour's house looking for him. It served his mom the right to panic after all her lies and deception he thought, but he felt a surge of mixed emotions thinking about his dad. He had to settle what had started in his home that morning before starting fresh with his new family.

"Sorry Josh, but I don't think I can stay," he said, looking down at the disappointment written all over his little buddy's face.

"What? Why not?" Josh thought it was Casey's fault that he suddenly wanted to leave. "Don't worry about her, she's always been weird. She'll get used to it very soon, she has to."

"Josh, I don't think it has anything to do with Casey." Cara tried to explain.

Kai and Nadine exchanged glances like if they had a secret code to understanding the hidden messages between the children. They knew that Zack's visit this morning would have been a temporary one. There was much to be done in order for Zack stay with them. It felt timely and yet untimely that they were now faced with a battle against the Wellingtons for the hope of reuniting with their son after eighteen long antagonizing years.

* * *

"Hello Dad!"

"Zack? Zack! Where are you?" Thomas asked on the line sounding confused and very panicked. "You do know you have some explaining to do? Where are you?" His concern was evident. Zack's heart sank, he had to finish what he had started at home. He had to face his mom.

"Is mom there?" His voice sounding drier than he expected. "We need to talk."

"Yes sure. Where are you? I know that all this might come as a shock to you, but we can talk about this at home."

"I'm not coming home dad."

"Can you at least try to forgive your mother? We will get her all the help that she needs just let us talk this over. Ok?"

"Meet me at the pizzeria, I will be there in an hour." Zack hung up before he changed his mind.

His body felt listless and he finally sat down and rocked back in his seat. Nadine put a hand over his and gently stroke it making circular motions with her thumb. He squeezed his eyes shut. She watched his tensed jaw and crinkled brows and thought that he looked a lot like Kai in this expression. It was all she wanted but never had she imagined the turmoil he would have to face. She felt guilty that in it all her son now stood victim to all the anxieties of having gone through so much hurt from the decisions that they made. It wasn't fair to him, they had to make it right somehow.

"I have to go," Zack looked at Nadine. "I have to meet my d_"
He paused paying attention to his choice of words.

"It's ok Zack." Nadine said squeezing his hand. She felt really ashamed that it was all she could offer to comfort him.

"Will you come back?" Josh asked. His words came as a quiver.

Zack took a deep breath and sighed. He nodded in response to Josh and gave him a weary smile. "I will be back sometime today, I just_" he took another deep breath. "I am not so sure when."

"Take all the time you need. Ok?" Nadine was trying to keep her emotions down but she couldn't help a few tears from escaping.

Zack stood up feeling quite torn himself, but he knew what he needed to do before making any decisions concerning Nadine and his siblings.

"Come on buddy I'll drop you should off." Kai rest a hand on Zack's shoulders. Zack just nodded and followed Kai outside.

Nadine followed them outside and held Zack by the elbow. Her desperation imminent, time began to flow awkwardly as one looking through a looking glass. Her world felt unfamiliar. She fought with herself not to hold him back and let him go just for now. Zack seemed to understand her request and gave her his biggest reassuring smile.

"I will come back to you don't worry." He turned and walked away leaving a sorrowful Nadine on the door step looking out after him. She stood watching until the car drove out of sight before turning back to the house with a heavy heart. Cara stood waiting to offer her childhood friend all the support she needed.

"I know what we have to do!" She announced holding Nadine around the shoulders.

"What?"

"An extension!"