Are we still in love?

She's not coming home this time

Wandas POV

Nothing, I felt nothing. Sure its cliche but its true. I don't even feel it anymore. I've become so accustomed to the tears falling that I'm pretty sure it would feel weird if they weren't dripping down my face. She lay motionless in my bed, the side that had been cold and empty since the first fight with Thanos, since the first time I lost her. I hadn't had them before then. The panic attacks only came when she wasn't there for me to seek out her for comfort. It had been like she was the sun and I was the clouds a perfect match for perfect weather, not to hot, not to cold. Now it was like she was the sun but I was the moon, they loved each other but could never be together. I just kept on chasing after her. Over and over and over. She was gone, but she could come back right? She did last time. It's the same thing, the same thing happened before, there was a snap and she was gone but she came back, she'll come back, yes?

I was sitting on my bed staring at the tv but not taking in any information it just distracted me from the pain. The tears were always falling but this time I could feel them and I could feel my heart racing. What if she didn't come back? What of this was it for us? What if we had been doomed from the beginning? I suddenly couldn't breath, it was like Thanos' hand was still wrapped around my throat. Panic surged through me, burning me from the inside.

"Vi- Vis-VISION!" I tried to yell but it came out as a strangled garble. I tried again "VISION HELP ME, PLEASE!" He came rushing in and could read the urgency from my eyes.

"Breath Wanda, breath. Follow me. In, out, in, out. Good, now tell me three things you can see." When I didn't reply he whispered "Please?"

"Y-you, Y/n and, and- the carpet." I replied with a shaky voice. 

"Okay, now three things you can hear?"

"M-me?" I asked smiling feebly, still choking on my breath. He nodded. "The tv and, and, and- I don't know. I'm sorry." He smiled "I'm so sorry vision." He looked at me perplexed 

"What?" 

"I- I used you, I used you and I shouldn't have, it was wrong and I knew it was but I was hurting and you were here and she wasn't. I shouldn't have done this!" 

"Oh." he looked down but when he looked up there was a smile on his face "I know. I always knew. It's not your fault. We just aren't meant to be ay?" He nudged me and I smiled as he pulled me in for a hug "But just because you don't love me, doesn't mean we have to hate each other right? I would hate for our friendship to not at least be given peace." My knew found smile wavered. I stood. I walked around my bed towards Y/ns small, frail body and picked her up with ease. It pained me as I realised how light she was. I walked out of my room but instead of glowing red with rage, as I had the night before, I walked slowly not sure if I was ready. I took some deep breaths, regaining composure, and I walked through the doors into the main room where everyone sat, still grieving the lack of Y/n L/n. I lingered at the path that led outside towards the burial service already prepared for her. I surged forward, outside and placed Y/n in her coffin. I sat down next to the tree placed as her gravestone and started to sing,

"I know, you belong to somebody new but tonight you belong to me." It was only now sinking in that she wasn't coming back as I heard silence when ever it would have been Y/ns turn to sing "Although, we're apart you're a part of my heart and tonight you belong to me. I know by the dawn you will be gone but tonight you belong to me." I kissed Y/ns forehead and walked away I walked straight past the other Avengers but Steve reached out and grabbed my arm before I could walk away, he pulled me into his chest and we cried. We sank to the floor and he just rocked me back and forth for a good ten minutes before I pulled away, smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek. I stood up and walked back to my room where I saw Vision waiting for me.

"I thought you shouldn't be alone umm I changed the sheets and everything but I wasn't sure if you wanted me here so I didn't get in the bed but it's up to you." I smiled not really feeling that joyous but I grabbed Visions hand and we clambered into bed. I placed my head on Visions chest and whispered,

"Stay" He smiled and turned on the tv. 

I visited Y/ns grave everyday but just couldn't seem to get over her death, I was just so empty, the pain was like a wave which just washed over me over and over again reminding me of my losses. I felt as if it wouldn't stop tormenting me until I just decided to sink deep into the pain and wallow in self-pity. 

One day I went to go and visit Y/ns grave when I saw a load of men in suits standing over it, talking. One man grabbed a shovel and started digging I was so shocked I hadn't even processed what he was doing but once I did I used my powers to grab the shovel and keep the men under restraints.

"What are you doing to her grave?" I asked, tilting my head.

"Wanda Maximoff pleasure to meet you, i'm director Hayward."

"Director of what?"

"S.W.O.R.D." 

"Fine doesn't matter what are you doing here?" I glanced back to see Steve and Tony coming outside hard expressions on there faces.

"Care to explain what's going on Wanda?" Steve asked placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah who are these guys?" Tony said standing in front of me, blocking me from danger.

"Director Hayward of S.W.O.R.D." He smiled an I kissed my teeth. "It is our legal requirement to take Y/ns-"

"Don't call her that, you didn't even know her!" I yelled 

"My apologies, it is our legal requirement to take Miss L/ns body for research." My jaw went slack and I tripped back into Steves arms. 

"Research!? Y/n is a human being not some mutant that you do tests on. She's had her fair share of them done to her back in HYDRA, now tell me do you want to be like HYDRA?!" 

"No because we can assure you she won't feel a thing!" One of the agents joked, laughing. I lifted him in the air with my magic and marched forward towards them. I snapped the mans neck and he fell to the floor. 

"Leave."

"Miss Maximoff-"

"LEAVE"

"I assure you we will be back. Make sure you look for emails labeled S.W.O.R.D." I heard some muttering about taking Gary, I suppose he was the man I killed, to the graveyard. I had read his mind whilst he under my magic, searching to see if he had any family or anything to redeem himself but all I could see was memories about how cool it would be if he could fuck me and other memories about dark alleyways and young girls. He was a disgrace of a man, a waste of space. I fell to my knees in front of Y/ns grave her trees roots spilling from the huge whole they had dug. I wanted to feel angry I wanted to want to hurt them but all I could feel at that moment was pain as I saw that they had at some point opened the coffin and now Y/n no longer lay in it.