The Euphoria

Chapter 10

At first he was happy when you called him. But when he saw what has happened, his heart ached when saw your condition. "Y/n..." you could see worries written all over his face. Saw him, your tears back streaming down your cheeks. He quickly hugs you and let you wail like a child, cries your heart out. He knows whatever he is saying won't matter. Your father passed away after all those fights for his life. He has given up. The time you heard the news that your father's condition was getting worse, you rushed to the hospital but by the time you arrived, your father had let go of his last breath.

 Once the funeral ended, you seemed to distance yourself from people. That includes him. He has been trying his best but you never opened the door for him. Leave alone opening the door, you didn't even showed your face to him.  It's been a month you've been like this. After graduating from your college, you just live. Only staying alive but not really living your life. Not working, not even contacting your friends, not even taking care of yourself. Again you heard him outside your house. Every single day, he would come and just try to talk to you then give up after a few hours. He would leave something like cakes or any other foods, sometimes he would leave random flowers that he probably picked at the side of the road or bought at the store after Rin remind him, there is flower shop exist in this world. He knew even though you didn't open your door, you were there sitting listening to whatever he was saying. "I.. had enough of this, y/n.." you flinched when you heard that. Just when you walked away from the front door, it flung open. Your eyes widened as you saw him smirked after kicking open your door "Sup, hon~ I had enough not seeing you~". He could see how much you are losing weight and how there are dark circles under your eyes. It pained him saw you like this. You quickly hide your face from him, embarrassed with how you look "W-what are you doing?! Leave!! I will call the police!!". Ignoring your words, he pinned you to the wall grabbing your chin and stole a kiss from you. Your eyes widened as your face turned bright red before you pushed him away, just when you were about to say something, again he pulled you into another kiss. Every time you are about to say something or having another outburst or sees you still have that upset look on your face, he would shut you up with another kiss. Finally you gave up after awhile, "A-alright p-please stop". You begged as he could see how embarrassed you were. "You really are shameless.." you mumbled as you hid your red face on his chest, weirdly enough it calmed you down. You could hear him chuckled as he wrapped his arms around you "Y/n, be my girlfriend..". "You will end up leaving me too in the end.. I will only bring a bad luck to you.." you sniffled a little. "Are you stupid or are you high? Why do you think everyday I'm coming here if I have no feelings for you?" you could feel his hand stroke your back in a calming way, you never know he has this side of him. You thought he was just some crazy ridiculous junkie that always gets high. "I don't know. You only like my boobs and my ass..?" you could feel him flinching slightly. "I do like them but only because they're yours. Y/n, I like YOU and whatever it is behind that rib of yours" heard that, you looked up at him confused before realised what he meant "you meant my heart?". "......Yes, your heart...Of course" you looked up at him with suspicious looks on your face. "Someone told you to say that huh.. I bet it's Ran or Rin" you could see him avert his eyes. Somehow you couldn't help but chuckle, again he felt his heart racing when saw you like that. He isn't sure what it is but he knows he likes it. No, he loves it. It then finally struck him, it felt like he is having the same euphoria when he first time take a high dose drugs but somehow this feelings way more intense, come to a realisation, he smiled a little, 'I see..I..love her..'. "Fine.. I will let you be my boyfriend.." Heard you saying that, you could see how his face brightened up and how big his smile is. Just when you saw how he was about to kiss you again, you stopped him "STOP!". You could see him give you a puppy eyes as you sighed "The door.. Fix it first. Then..You can get the kiss". That is enough for him to rushed making a call, of course he won't fix it but someone will.

At first you told him to hide your relationship from people, especially your senior since you want to take everything slow. It's been three months since you are in a relationship with him. There you sit in the bathroom with a pale face. You've been having sex with him since the second month of your relationship. So much for trying to take it slow, it's hard to control your boyfriend as he even sometimes drugged you  and made you feel needy or beg for him. "H-how.. " you mumbled as you know you always make sure he wears protection and you are always on your morning pills. Little did you know, he has been poking all those condoms with needles and switching your morning pills with vitamins. Panicking, you end up calling your senior, asking to meet up with her.

"YOU WHAT?! Y/N ARE YOU INSANE?! HOW??" you chuckles weakly as you just averted your eyes "U-um well.. We are in a relationship..actually.. And one night we were watching this movie and-"."Why him?! Why that junkie?! Of all the men in Japan, why him??? How come you end up sleeping with him?! " your senior slammed her hands on the table as you flinched "I don't know!! It just.. I love him and he was really funny that night-". "THEN LAUGHS!! FFS, Y/N! If he is funny then laughs and not get yourself knocked up!! What were you thinking spreading your legs opened just because he made you laugh?! One joke and that's all to make you sleep with him?! You just graduated.. You.. God.. Have you told him?". You shook your head as you just lay on the tatami floor "I don't know how to tell him, senpai.. What if he didn't want this.. I meant.. We always use protection when doing it..". "What about you? Do you want to have his child? You know what kind of man he is, right?" you sighed as you knew well what your senior meant. There are big chances your baby won't be born like a normal child due to him being an addict. You touched your stomach as you stroked it "...I..honestly don't know...". "Think it through.. But if I were you.. I would go to the hospital for more check up..".

Took her advice, you secretly went to hospital to do some check up and you are a month pregnant. You bit your lip, wondering how you should tell him about this all. You've asked the doctor why you didn't have any symptoms of pregnancy like morning sickness. Apparently not everyone will get morning sick when they're pregnant. "What do I do.." you mumbled as you felt the anxiety deep inside you. Leave alone having a child, you two even never talked about marriage. Then it hit you, he never ever said he love you. That thought alone, made your anxiety get worse.