Seasalt

00

How intoxicatingly sweet it is to be envelope in your warm embrace. Arms circling around him protectivelyㅡa sign of a yearning affection he holds dear, but never his to call his own.

It was terrifying....to hold you here, right now.

Knowing that after such short bliss, he'll never be able to do so again.

How painfully bittersweet... this thing they call it.

Was it wrong to hold you with such affection closing in between his shaking arms, his short quiet breath of relief brushing past his parted lips. Was it wrong to search for the fondness in your eyes whenever he openly shows you his own. Was it wrong, was it wrong to fall in love?

Perhaps, it is his nature.
He was a man deprived of assured future,
A man of no treasures and riches to be hold,
A man incapable of holding any thing fragile in between his wounded fingers. A man such as him wouldn't be able to hold a person of your worth.

Slowly, regretfully... he pulled away, a soft smile tugging the corners of his lips. His eyes looks at you with such fondness and affection one that you hadn't noticed ever since.

But it's alright, he thought.

It's better this way...

On the way back to your homeland that evening, aboard by the raven haired captain herself, the ivory head ronin finds his way towards you. A smile can be seen etched across his gentle face, as he draws closer. He can notice your tired posture, your eyes slowly drifting onto sleep.

Perhaps the previous battle and events that unfold prior before has wore you down. Gently, he sat beside you, slowly aligning your head towards his awaiting shoulder.

"Sleep... I'll be here." His voice so soft, so gentle, like a passing breeze.

A small hum left your lips, as you slowly drift off to sleep.

The male breathes in the cold evening air basking in the moonlight glow. The moon is brighter than before indeed...even the waves are surprisingly calm as they whisk around the ship in harmless pattern, almost lulling him into sleep.

But he couldn't..
At least not yet,

He breathes in, albeit a little careful as a shaky exhale left his lips...pondering, he looks down. A soft smile grace his face, bringing his hand towards your face, he tucks a strand of hair away from your closed lids.

"...you're beautiful." He breathes out to no one.

Kazuha is not a man of few words, he knits wonderfully woven words into precious poetries and phrases, a skill he had mastered for when he was a child. Perhaps his years of private lessons paid of afterall...until you come along...

Suddenly, he couldn't bring himself to strewn the words he so painstakingly want you to hear, his usual words of fascinating phrases and sentences, carefully woven with care and thought has dissipated whenever you're around... He had remain silent, like a broken record beyond repair albeit a little like himself, but surely...not enough.

But then again, he thought.
It's better this way.

If only it is possible to stretch this evening to lifetime, he'd so allow it to happen, you, just being here with him, was a blessing he couldn't fathom into words.

It's just you, it's always been you.

He stares at your closed lids, your slightly parted lips, your soft breathing patterns.

He ingrained them all to his memories, refusing to left a single detail behind.

"I love you..."

ー

You skipped down the steps towards the Guyun's seashore. An excited smile can be seen plastered across your face as your feet landed on the ground with a silent thump.

"Home at last!" You laugh for a short while, before turning back around to the unknowing pair of eyes watching you with delicate fondness etched across his gaze.

"Kazuha, why won't you guys stay for a short while, I bet Captain Beidou wants to try the Jueyun chili noodles first before embarking on your next journey..." you suggested, a hopeful expression on your face, one that Kazuha would most definitely fall for and drop all his agenda in mind... but that wasn't the case for now, as much as he wants to stayㅡto accompany you for a while longer just as how much his heart begs him to....He knows he just couldn't.. at least not in your homeland.

Despite the pain tugging at his poor chest, he wills himself to smile and politely refuse your offer,

"I am afraid we couldn't stay any longer..."

'But know that I'd love to accompany you.'

The dejected look on your face won't go unnoticed. The ronin was so close to take back his words, grab your hand in his and away you goㅡsomewhere, some place he'd have you all on his own.

But he stubbornly push these thoughts aside with a smile so grim, but before you could comment anything about it, he gently laughs and bid you his quick farewell, he turned around to walk back on the ship. His once joyful face morphed into one of regretful expression, finally hidden from your view.

It's better this way...

"Good bye! I'll see you all soon, take care! Especially you Kazuha!" You shouted back as soon as they retrieve the anchor, the said male was seen with yet another strange smile, but you couldn't put yourself to wonder why it was so different..

Kazuha's yearning eyes wandered to you for one last time, until his gaze fluttered behind you, a look of pain flashes in his eyes for a good second before he wills himself to look away... his hands finding comfort against the railing of the ship.

Yes.. perhaps, it is better this way.

ー
As the Crux Fleet disappears from the horizon, a sigh of relief went past your lips, you slowly indulge in the familiar salty air the Guyun islands welcomes you with.

"__________." A soothing voice called you from behind, turning around you saw the person you've been yearning to see for months.

For not being able to leave Liyue due to his contract, seeing him again has put your heart in tremendous aching sensationㅡthat all you want to do is to held him close, never once letting go.

Fighting back the tears you glomped the poor male, he almost lost his balance, but he holds you back eitherway, albeit gentler and softer.

His one arm wrapping around your waist securely, pulling you closer to his familiar warmth.

Oh how you missed his touch, his warmth, his voice, his scent... everything.. his everything...

"I miss you so much, Xiao..."