The Song Remains the Same

Chapter 4

Callie had agonized for the rest of the night after Arizona left and had come to the reluctant conclusion that what had happened last night – being lonely and alone with Arizona, in the dark, listening to the rain – it couldn't happen like that again. Because she couldn't put either one of them in that vulnerable position. It wouldn't have taken much for her to have done something she was determined not to let happen, like kissing Arizona. Not that she didn't want to kiss Arizona. She absolutely did. But she wasn't going to kiss her when all she could offer her was angst and pain.

But she couldn't say that it wasn't good to see Arizona walk into the morning meeting, the smile sent her way making her heart jump in her chest. “Good morning, Dr. Torres.” Arizona sounded almost hyper friendly. “Dr. Hunt.” Now she wasn't, not that Owen noticed.

Callie sent her a look, eyebrow arched. “Good morning, Dr. Robbins.”

Arizona's smile was radiant, magical. Callie could see the second the expression tightened and grew strained. “Could I – could we talk after the meeting?” Arizona asked, her voice dropping. She needn't have bothered. Owen wasn't paying attention to them.

Nodding, Callie sighed. “Of course.” She knew exactly what Arizona wanted to talk about and it was a conversation she knew they needed to have. No matter how much she didn't want to do it.

Arizona led them to the lounge as soon as they were dismissed by Ellis Grey, holding the door and following Callie in. She didn't want to be the first one to speak though, not entirely sure what would come out of her mouth. Because she liked Callie. A lot. And not simply platonic, friendly feelings either. That would be easier.

“I like you,” Callie said, her back against the counter top where she could feel the edge digging into her back. She'd kept her mouth closed for years about how she felt in her marriage with Owen but now she simply couldn't keep the truth inside. “Really like you, I mean.” It felt unbelievable to actually say it, regardless of the fact that saying it was all she could do with the feelings. She didn't ask for an answer but her eyes made it impossible for Arizona to deny her.

“I like you too,” she admitted, breathing deep. “But we can't -”

“I know.” Callie sighed. “I'm sorry about last night. I was upset, and you're just so sweet -” She chewed on her bottom lip for a second. “I want us to be friends though. If that's still possible.”

“Yes,” Arizona said emphatically. “We're friends. That hasn't changed.” She licked her lips, her gaze flickering to where white teeth were worrying a full lower lip. “Last night, though...” Last night had gotten too close to the line they'd drawn for themselves. Next time she might not worry so much about crossing it. And she couldn't do that to Callie.

“Yeah.” Her voice was heavy. “I'm sorry.”

Arizona smiled, head shaking from side to side. She was determined not to look at Callie's lips for the rest of this conversation. “I told you you have to stop apologizing to me. We didn't do anything wrong last night. And we're not going to. So stop saying that you're sorry, okay?” she requested, stepping closer to the other woman. “Okay?” she prompted again when Callie didn't agree right away.

“Okay,” she said with a laugh, relieved when Arizona sent her a dimpled grin. “Can I say thank you?”

“When I hand you things, yes,” Arizona answered her lightly, her nose wrinkling when she laughed. It was adorable. The expression slowly sobered. “Have you talked to Owen?”

Callie shook her head, eyes dropping to her shoes. “Not yet.” Honestly, her first priority this morning had been talking to Arizona, making sure her friendship wasn't going to disintegrate before her eyes the way her marriage already had. The damage with Owen was already done and had been for a long while now. She couldn't bear to let anything hurt the growing friendship she'd found with Arizona.