The Song Remains the Same

Chapter 27

Arizona had been around this hospital for hours and days at a time but she hadn't felt nerves like this with a patient in ages. She was in charge of her OR, her service, knew exactly how to handle her patients. She didn’t go into her OR without knowing exactly what was going to happen, a plan for every contingency. Pacing outside Nick's room, she had no idea what she was going to say to him when she walked through the door.

If she didn't walk through the door though then she might as well have stayed home with Callie and the kids. So Arizona resolved to put her head down and go without any expectations or ideas how it was going to turn out. She hadn't talked to Nick in months, and nothing like how they used to talk when they were younger. Before so many things had changed.

“I can see you, you know,” Nick called from his bed, waving. “Are you going to talk to me now?” Arizona edged into the doorway but didn't speak. “You didn't bring your kids to meet their Uncle Nick? And you went and got yourself hitched without telling anyone?”

“Callie and I aren't married,” Arizona corrected him, her arms crossing her chest. “And they're not my kids, they're hers.”

His grin didn't slip. “Maybe not yet.”

“I didn't come here to talk about – I'm here to talk to you.” She moved into the room one step at a time. “You didn't tell me that you're sick. Callie said the scans you brought in were old.”

“So we've got plenty to talk about. Where do you want to start?” Nick asked, his attitude as light and easygoing as it had ever been.

It pissed Arizona off suddenly. “Does anything actually touch you? Does it all just roll off your back?” Nick shrugged, still grinning. “Do you even care that you're sick? Do you care what it's doing to Mom and Dad? To me?”

“Is it doing anything to you?” he snapped back, sitting up straighter as his expression darkened. “You've barely said two words to me since yesterday.”

Arizona bristled. “You know how hard it is for me, to see you -”

“Tim -”

“God, is this not about Tim!” Arizona barked at him. She stepped forward in a rush and he pushed himself up on both hands. “This is about you, being sick and too stupid to tell me until it's -” Arizona stopped herself, breathless and panting. “Why couldn't you just tell me? The doctor part of my name isn't just decoration, you know? I could have helped you before it ever got to this!”

Nick's easy grin tightened. “Does that mean your girlfriend isn't the miracle worker we were promised?” He was trying to tease but he just sounded choked.

“This is not Callie's fault,” Arizona stated hoarsely, fighting the impulse to stab two fingers in his face. Fighting with him wouldn't help anything between them though and she took a measured breath. “Why didn't you come in sooner?”

Nick's eyes slid away from her, skating along the walls. “You weren't the only one who ran.” His expression was morose, tone solemn, and Arizona sucked in a breath. Both had taken Tim's death hard, reacting in much the same way – burying themselves in work and a cross-country change of scenery. Nick's jump had been followed by several smaller bounces that had become a career as a globe hopping photojournalist. He'd done well for himself, after Tim's death. They both had. But they'd lost more than their brother when he'd died. Grief and distance had taken them away from each other as well. “I couldn't see you without seeing him, Tempe.”

Arizona sighed heavily, understanding but still frustrated. “You know there are other doctors in the world, right? You could have gone to someone else.”

“I did,” he told her quietly. “But here we are anyway.” He'd gone to specialists as far from Seattle, Washington as he'd been able to find but they'd all pointed him here. Dragging his heels as much as possible had only delayed the inevitable – him in this bed and Arizona standing across the room. “You know you're dating the best Cardio doc in practically the whole damn world, right?”