Needs Approval

Chapter One

It was a sunny Wednesday. Jordan checked into the Cincinnati airport, tears of both fear and joy. This is it he thought.

Jordan had narrowly escaped persecution in Jordan (the country, not him). ISIS had completely taken over the refugee camp he had been staying in. Five others including him had to flee to America-from boat, to bicycle, to jaguar bus. And now they were at the immigration checkpoint.

When Jordan walked up to the gateway, the super-fat border patrol stops him. "Hey turban-man, we don't have room in 'Merica for your fat ass." Jordan turned around to see the antagonist and saw the fattest man alive.

"Hey cunt. Say that to me again!" The absolutely obese man lumbered over to Jordan. "That's not the way you talk to THE Kevin James!" he hollered as his face turned beet red. He attempted to get up and slap him, only to be weighed down by his 500 pounds of pure fat.

Jordan then pulled out his machete and stabbed poor Kevin straight through, all 12 feet of it. A whole wave of hamburgers, livers, stomach fluids, and tons of blood flowed extravagantly out of Kevin's stomach. His skin was still beet red as Jordan strolled away.

Sure, his sociopathic, homicidal tendencies were quite common nowadays, and his temper was as short as his penis. Seeing women getting raped in public had become a regular sight to see, so why not murder? After all, his dad, an ISIS captain, raped his mom and disowned (and later burned) his brother as a Jordan pilot; plus, it didn't help at all that Jordan was attracted to men.

All of the sudden his phone started ringing, interrupting his thoughts. He took his zphone 1.563 out of his pocket and looked at the number. Emma. Emma Watson to be exact. Apparently she was some kind of big deal here in 'Merica.

"Hey Shit-Face." He said.

"You son of a bitch. You took quite a while to finally get here." she responded. "Are you getting hunted down by ISIS?" Kissing noises leaked out of Jordan's phone. Jordan cringed as he held his phone away from him. He did a 360, checking all of his surroundings. "Nope, I don't think so. After I gave all of them more American journalists to behead they seemed to have not followed me at all. I don't think they noticed me leave."

"Well, I'm at the front entrance, next to the lesbian couple making out," Emma replied. Well that would explain the kissing noises—or was that him thinking? Jordan looked for the baggage claim as he replied. "Okay, see you there."

And at the same time, another person ran into him, checking out his luggage, and practically sprinting. He bumped into Jordan and only scrambled a "Sorry" as he ran off. Jordan checked to see if he had all his baggage. His only carry-on was there. He shrugged, and walked toward the entrance.

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I'm co-creating this book with my friend. Say hi Vincent.

(Vincent) "no

So, great first impression, am I right? This is the start of my very first book, and this book will be VERY offensive. Please, don't take it seriously.

Can you get in trouble on Wattpad for making something too offensive? Is ISIS  copyrighted?

So many references to things- see if you can find them all ;)