𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐈𝐃𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒

[𝟑𝟏] 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄

𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐄, 𝐍𝐘𝐂!

You were sitting on your bed watching tv, tomorrow was the day of Elijah's funeral and you just couldn't bring yourself to go. You didn't care if it made you look like a bad sister or if it made you look guilty, you just couldn't go.

Because then it was final.

He would finally be gone.

"(y/n) i've washed and dried your outfit for tomorrow" your mom said as she entered your room with the outfit in her hand, you didn't bother moving your eyes to look at her and instead they stayed on the tv.

It's all you did.

Watch tv, get food, sleep, repeat.

You hadn't seen any of your friends for almost three weeks and you didn't intend on seeing them anytime soon, you barely had energy to go to the toilet let alone socialise.

"I'm told you i'm not going" you mumbled as she was in front of your closet hanging up the outfit, she turned around and looked at you. She was exhausted, mentally and physically.

"and i told you that you are, you're going to pay your respects to your brother and say goodbye to him" she calmly said as she started to pick up the clothes scattered around on the floor.

"I told you i'm not saying goodbye to him" you mumbled once again and she let out a sigh.

"(y/n) we've already had this conversation, i don't have time to-" she paused and slightly bent her head down to look at you "are you high right now?"

You pushed out your bottom lip and shrugged your shoulders, your eyes were still on the tv and it was clear she was getting annoyed "(y/n) look at me right now"

She waited for a moment before speaking again "I said look at me (y/n)!" she repeated but her voice was raised this time. You lazily lifted your head up and looked over in her direction, once your eyes made contact with hers she let out a scoff and ran her hand through her hair.

"I understand you lost your brother but i lost my son and you don't see me doing nothing but getting high and drinking so much that i come home at 3, 4am not even being able to walk up the stairs properly. We all still have responsibilities (y/n) and you need to acknowledge that real quick" you looked away from her and looked down at the floor, you were tired of having these talks with her, you were tired of people telling you that you can't do things, you were just tired of life.

"Well done for acknowledging that he was your son" you sarcastically commented and a wave of pain hit her at the use of 'was' "I know i have responsibilities i just don't give a fuck anymore, i don't care about anything. But right now my main responsibility is trying to keep myself alive so what do you want, two dead children or a child that is trying their best to stay alive"

"I'm trying to help you here (y/n), i'm watching you change into a person that you'd hate so for this family please stop" she asked but deep inside she was begging before it got to late.

"Oh you're helping me? by what? nagging at me every two seconds or commenting on something about me? we're not a family anymore and you know that so nothing you say or do will help to make me change, the second i woke up in that hospital was the second that i knew i was never going to be the same" you watched as her eyes become glossy, she didn't have anything else to say so she just walked out of the room.