What If I Don't Even Want To? (Kellic)

Chapter 2

The rest of the unpacking and arranging of our new place took the entire weekend to finish, and by the time Monday rolled around I was exhausted. I swear if I saw another box, I'd probably go insane and rip my hair out (which is saying a lot because I'm actually pretty paranoid about my hair). My mom and I had hardly spoken in the past couple of days unless it was an awkward "excuse me" while trying to get around each other. I guess that was one aspect we shared, we were both extremely stubborn. Honestly, I didn't know who would take the first few steps in mending things this time. In the past, sometimes it was her and then other times it had been me but I couldn't see myself doing it this time around. No matter how hard I tried to tell myself that she probably had a good reason for ripping me out of my home, I couldn't shake off the resentment I had for her. The fight that had happened the first night in our new place hadn't helped. Ever since then, it was kind of like we just ignored the other one existed up until the morning of my first day at school.

Everything in me wanted to just roll back onto my stomach and return to the dream land where I was safe of what would come with my new school. It's not like I was afraid of people not liking me, in fact I couldn't have cared less about what they would think of me. All they would be are temporary faces, ones that I wouldn't even have time to memorize before leaving them behind without a second glimpse past my shoulder. And as much as I loved my mother, I had made up my mind. My life wasn't here in San Diego, it was back in my small town of Michigan. I had imagined my entire future playing out there, and now that had been severely fucked up. The only thing I was focused on was graduating and getting my ass back to where I belonged with my friends.

"Kellin, it's time to get up!" I heard my mom say behind the other side of the door. She at least respected my privacy enough not to go walking in. God forbid if she did, I was a teenager after all and I'd rather avoid awkward conversations of what she could possibly walk in on. It wasn't like I had never had a girl in my room before, but I usually saved that for the nights she was gone.

"Kellin, did you hear me?" She asked again, knocking on my door.

I gave a roll of my eyes, feeling annoyed since I was only half awake before groaning. Like a child, I kicked my blanket off in a fit then stalked my way over to the door. By the time I had it open, my mom was in mid-knock position and looked surprised to see me up. The expression was quickly replaced by her amusement in my bedhead though as she smiled almost too sweetly.

"It's time to get ready for school, baby."

"I know, I'm up. I heard you the first fifteen times." I exaggerated with a scowl then gave a whine of disgust. "Don't call me baby, mom. It's weird, okay? I'm almost eighteen."

"You'll always be my baby no matter what age you are." Oh, she was really laying it on thick this morning. I guess she was the first one to be taking the steps towards the healing process before she snuck a kiss on my forehead which I quickly attempted to wipe away. "Hurry up, get a shower. You're running late."

Not even bothering to point out the fact that I knew I was running late but had been hoping that maybe the new school would blow up in some freak accident, I turned in the opposite direction. It only took me seconds to reach the bathroom at the end of the hall and shut the door behind me. After I had stripped myself of my boxers, I let the hot water run for a moment and collected my thoughts while standing in front of the cabinet's mirror just above the sink. Steam began to collect around the edges of the glass, but I focused on my own reflection in the middle of the foggy outline. My blue eyes looked a little tired and my dark hair really was more of a curly mess than usual, I guess I could understand why my mom had smirked at me. In general, I just looked like I wanted to murder someone which probably wasn't the best way to start off at someplace new. So while I waited for the inspiration to drag myself into the shower to come along, I practiced different faces to make it look like I wasn't dreading everything around me. Honestly, it was kind of harder than it looked.