DROWN

6. TW

One needs more courage to live than the courage to die.

- Unknown

Here I am trying this again. Hopefully this time it works. I cannot wait to leave, everyone treats me like broken glass. They think they got rid of all the items I could kill myself with, but they forgot the rope, I wanted it to be painless but now this is the only way.

Life is a stupid game. What is the point of living if we are going to die at some point? Resources shouldn't be wasted on people who don't want to live life, when I die I hope someone who wants to live will take my place.

It's 1:00 am. I'm drowning in pain, I sneak into the garage and find ropes from our rock climbing gear. I tie the ropes around a hook on my door and tie it around my neck.  I take the kitchen knives and start cutting at my wrists whilst my neck is tied with rope. There is no way I'm surviving this I think to myself. 

Again a familiar sense washes over me, that sense that death is near. I lose consciousness and all I see is black. I suddenly feel the rope pulled off my neck. No, no, no, this can't be happening. I want out of here I can't the pain is too much.

TIME SKIP

A bright light wakes pulls my eyes open. Is this Heaven, everything is so bright. Once my eyes have adjusted I see where I am. In a Hospital. Of fucking course I survived this, that's one shitty God, he thinks this shit is funny. 

I pull the needles out of my arm in an attempt to try again but an alarm goes off and soon a large group of nurses walk in, I scream and shout and all I see is red, how dare they try to let me live, it's so blatantly clear I don't want to be here.

Two of the nurses hold me down and another pricks me with a needle and I fall unconscious, yet I can still hear the conversations going on around me.

I hear the nurses and doctors talking to my parents about sending me to a psychiatric ward to 'get better' I mentally scoffed, they couldn't do anything to me.

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