heather | saebyeok

사 | are you okay

saebyeok was walking home , when it started to rain . her eyes were hurting , and getting soaked to the skin was the least she wanted . she rolled her eyes . she didn't want to go home , she hated being home , with her mom . she arrived at her house , took a deep breath and rushed into the building , she didn't want to catch a cold . she opened the door, went inside, took off her shoes and ran upstairs to her room . her mom wasn't home - fortunately - so saebyeok took a shower . she ate her sandwich from yesterday and started doing her homework . 

later , when she was done studying , she heard a loud thud from downstairs . mom is home . fun . she thought , and closed her room's door . she didn't want to fight with her mom again . it's really tiring and overwhelming , plus who would want to argue with their parents . well not saebyeok . she had enough of that . then she turned off the lights in her room , and went to bed . she heard her door opening , but she pretended to be asleep .

" thank god she's sleepig already . " said the woman standing in the door , then walking out of the room . 

saebyeok took a deep breath and turned around , putting her phone on the charger . she just wanted to sleep , and her mom wasn't bothering her and yelling at her - finally - so she went to sleep . for real this time . but before she could fell asleep , she remembered yuko . she remembered how today , she hold her hand . yuko has the softest skin , and her touch made saebyeok's heart beat faster - though her , saebyeok , didn't want to admit it . 

what the black haired girl didn't know , was that yuko was thinking about her too .

—

saebyeok woke up to her mom yelling at her because of sleeping through her alarm . the girl frowned , but got up and chose her outfit for the day . she packed her stuff and went downstairs . her mom was in the kitchen , but saebyeok put on her shoes and rushed out of the house . but before she could close the door behind her , she could feel someone grabbing his arm . she turned around still in her mom's grip , and looked at the woman . her mom looked angry - as always . 

" where do you think you're going ? you don't want to have breakfast with your mother ? " she asked .

"did you make breakfast ? " asked saebyeok , wanting to go , but the grip on her hand only got stronger , it started to hurt .

" me ? good joke saebyeok , now go back to the kitchen , and make breakfast for me . " said the woman .

" no . "

" what did you say ? "

" i said no , now let me go , i'm late for school . " she said pulling out her hand out of her mother's grip . her mom was about to hit her , but she could run away in time .

" you aren't good for anything . why do you even live ? " she could hear her mom yelling after her , but she couldn't care less .

well , saebyeok always acts like she doesn't care . and sometimes , she really doesn't , because she's used to it , used to her mother yelling at her , and telling her horrible things , but sometimes she really cares and sometimes these things hurt her . and she often  feels like no one loves her . she had a friend back in her other school , but of course , they had to move . so now she really doesn't have anyone . just herself . and that can get lonely after a long time .

she put her earphones in her ears , and played some music . she was repeating her mom's words in her head . why do you even live ? why do i even live ? she thought . that's a good question . and she doesn't know the answer to it . maybe she's waiting for a person , who is worth staying for . maybe she'll find someone . maybe . if not .. then why should she stay ? why should she live , if even her own mother hates her . she doesn't have anyone . not even her sister , not even her dad . she's stuck with a woman , who can only yell at her and hit her . why me ? she thought when she entered the school .