Just Another Dancer💃🏻 (A Rosénali Story)

xxiii

A.N - includes self harm and talk about the topic and I'm sorry that I literally loath this book. I've been pushing it away from my brain for so long that I haven't posted a new chapter in literally a month. If you're even bothering to read this, you're amazing and I'm surprised you can bear this terrible writing.

Rosé's POV:

A few weeks later...

The next weeks were pure hell. Denali and I hadn't had a conversation in all of this time and we would only see each other backstage, onstage or at group dinners.

Denali seemed perfectly fine. Whenever she didn't realise I was there, she would be smiling with her bright teeth that would accentuate her adorable dimples. It was only when I was around, she was uncomfortable. I couldn't blame her.

We were both now awkwardly sitting next to each other as Mik applied Denali's makeup. I stared into my reflection and saw myself start to crack. My eyes were glassy and I could barely breath.

"I can't do this..." I stood up and ran back to my dressing room. I was both relieved and shocked when I saw Jan and Lagoona sitting as if they were waiting for me.

"Rosé, what's wrong?" Asked Jan as she stood up to hug me. "Is this about what happened with Denali?"
I let my tears fall as Lagoona and Jan comforted me. Denali and I weren't meant for each other and that was that. I just had to deal with it.

I sighed as I heard Denali and Mik giggling together. I watched Denali stand up and walked off.
Get over her Rosé.
Soon enough, the lights started to flicker for a while until it finally cut out. I couldn't see anyone, I could only hear the screams from the audience.

Jan ran up to the stage and took a deep breath.
"EVERYONE! WE APOLOGISE FOR THIS INCONVENIENCE! WE PLAN TO START THIS SHOW ONCE THE ELECTRICITY COMES BACK. PLEASE STAY SILENT AND CALM UNTIL THE POWER COMES BACK." Jan yells.

Immediately the audience's screams turned into silent mumbles and whispers.
"THANK YOU!" Jan yells. Immediately after Jan went backstage, she chugged a whole bottle of water before coughing a bit.

"That's the last time I'm ever doing that!" Jan breathed. Lagoona and I hugged Jan tightly, thanking her.
"I'm going to try find everyone." Said Lagoona.
She soon came back with all the dancers and Mik.

"Lucia?"
"I'm here."
"Mik?"
"Yup."
"Denali?"

Silence.

"Denali?" I said, starting to freak out.
"Where's Denali?" Stammered Lagoona.
"She went to the bathroom after I finished her makeup, she might be there." Said Mik.
I nodded and slowly made my way to the bathroom.

I looked at my phone but realised it had died.
I had to use my sense of touch to reach the bathroom. Once I felt the cold handle of the door, I pulled it towards me and I inevitably heard silent sobs.

The lights flickered for a moment and Denali was on the floor, holding her wrist tightly. Her makeup was running down her face and her eyes widened as she made eye contact with me.

The lights stopped flickering and turned off once again. Denali continued to cry and she hiccuped.
"W-what are you d-doing here?" Denali s.
"I came to find you. Everyone's gathered backstage."
"I see..." Denali stood up and the lights flickered again. I looked at Denali's wrist and it was smudged with blood.

Denali realised what I saw and she hid her wrist behind her back and kicked the pocket knife that had been laying on the floor away.
"Denali." I said sternly as I walked up to her.
"I- I c-" Denali stammered as I gently pushed her to the wall.

She whimpered as she looked in my eyes. Darkness filled the room and I could only hear Denali's heavy and shaky breath.
"Why?" I said as I cried.
"... Rosé I... I..."
"Please tell me why you're doing this to yourself. Please." I sobbed as I held her head in my hands.
"No..." She breathed.
"Nali..." Denali whimpered. "Please tell me..."

"I hate myself. I'm not good enough. I can't hold onto my blessings and I only push people away. I'm sick of it..." Denali sighed. "I wanted to feel something other than just sadness."
"So you chose physical pain?" I replied.

I wrapped my arms around Denali's neck but she snaked away from my grasp.
"Why would you even care about me?" Denali asked as she walked towards the sinks.

"Don't you get it? It's because I'd do anything for you."