Doom Lord Stuff filled with inconsistencies and procrastination

Pain Problem

"Stop. I said stop... OH, WILL YOU CUT IT OUT?!" Doom screamed at Pain. "There's two guys in this room, why are you POKING ME?!" "I kept calling your name but you never move an inch! Don't go off scolding me for trying something else to gain your attention!"

Hazard and Malice were watching them. "Gosh, you two need to have a civil conversation for once," Hazard said. "By this rate, you'll be kicking each other hoping to get their head off." "We're Doom Lords, what did you expect? Us sitting at a small table drinking tea and eating cookies?" Doom glared at them but neither of them seemed fazed.

"Gah, did Doom say 'poking'? Pain was poking her? I would rather not have her doing that to me." Malice commented. "I wouldn't do it to you if you respond to me calling your name!" Pain called from Doom's table. "And, I won't even touch you either way."

"I- what- well- good." He seemed shaken by the response. Hazard saw this and frowned. He yanked him out of his chair by his arm. "Fine. Have your conversation elsewhere, and we'll have ours elsewhere too." Pain tugged on Doom's collar, which brought her down and almost caused her to hit her head on the table. "I swear, those two have a thing for each other." She whispered. Doom pulled her off her. "Don't do that again." She said between gritted teeth.

Pain took in a deep breath. "Look, well both of them are gone now... But look! Have you noticed that Hazard became protective of Malice? It's weird, right?! After having that day at the mall two weeks ago, you would think it would be Malice that would be protective of him. What kind of chat did they have when we left?" After she was finished, she gasped for air. "I get what you're saying, but could you please slow down?" Doom said. Pain rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "Yeah, and I thought you liked fast-paced."

Doom squinted her eyes at her with confusion. What the hell does she mean? "Well, what do you want to talk about? Poking me would all be for nothing. Don't tell me you did it just for fun." Pain suddenly looked embarrassed. She fidgeted with her hands. "I... Need someone to rant to."

"Rant to?!" Doom exclaimed. "You have Plague!" She looked up and stared at her. "Look around you." She said firmly. "Who do you see?" Doom was about to answer when Pain said. "Wait, don't actually answer that!" She did a small shake of her head. "Really Pain, you're getting on my nerves..."

"YOU AND ME! Why? Do you think I would talk to the chair?"
"I mean, if you're crazy enough."
"BUT I'M NOT. Plus the reason I told you that was because Plague isn't here!"
Doom sighed. "Whaatttt...?"
"I had a bad day..."
"Haven't we all? You're not special."
"DOOOMMMMM! I'M RANTING TO YOU! DON'T MAKE ME USE YOU AS A BODY-
PILLLLL... PUNCHING BAG!"

Pain turned red, punched the table and she jumped back, shaking her hand violently.
"I'm guessing the table hurt you more than you hurt it?"
"Yes... What is this table made out of?"
"To be honest, I don't know. I don't remember."
"Wow, you're sooooooooo useful." She said with a sarcastic tone.

"But what were you gonna say? Your voice kinda trailed off at 'pil.'." Doom asked. Pain mumbled and struggled to find proper words. "I- spikes- hiking- heck- uh- OH JUST-" She tried punching the table again, but Doom stopped her. "No, stop. You're making a mess. Let's chat away from the tables."

Pain protested and tried getting her to lose her grip, but to no avail. She gave up and let Doom drag her to the middle of the Meeting Room by the hand. Doom put her hands on her hip. "Okay, what's wrong? Do it quick, make it straightforward." "Hmm..."

"DON'T BE MAD!" Doom whined. "JUST TELL ME OR I'M LEAVING!" "Fine-fine-fine-fine. So first, when I was walking to the Meeting today, because there were no cabs for some striking reason, some rude a-hole splashed mud on me." She nodded. "Mhm." "I had to wash it off, that why I was late." "Wow, and I thought that was a lie."

"Yeah... You yelled at me and almost BURNT ME!"
"Hey, at least you're better than Frown who never shows up 99.9% of the time."
"That did not help. Well after that, I left for a few minutes, but then those minutes turned into an hour because I almost got kidnapped."
"KIDNAPPED?!" Doom's voice raised. She started compiling Pain with questions. "Who were they? Do you remember them? What were their motives? What type of-"

"Woah-woah! Okay, okay! Chill!" Pain said to a highly-vibrating Doom. "I'm here in one piece, right? Why are you that worried?" "Huh...? No? I'm not worried. I'm just... Mad if you go missing, that would be one less Doom Lord and our plan won't work."
"I'm pretty sure you are."
"I'M NOT!"
"You can keep denying all you want. But your past self almost killed me again."
"You should've told me!"

Pain continued. "Then you told me to leave, I did, but then another a-hole spilled food on me. Guess what? I had to go back home!" Doom noticed Pain's voice was starting to break, as if she was about to start crying, before she could point it out, she said out her next sentence. "I received a phone call. And he said I needed to pay rent, but I'm broke..."

"I'm... I'm asking if..." Her voice trailed off. Suddenly Pain wrapped her arms around Doom and she jolted in surprise. "What- WHAT ARE YOU-"
"WAHHHH, I CAN'T ANYMORE. I'M FINANCIALLY BROKE BECAUSE OF CABS AND NOW I'M EMOTIONALLY BROKEN BECAUSE OF DUMB GUYS." Pain cried, she dug her face into Doom's chest and sobbed. Doom was puzzled, what was she supposed to do?!

Doom looked around. What if someone comes in? Hazard is notorious for that, Plague too. But Doom felt bad for her, anyway, this was a living thing hugging her and it would be a bad move to shout at her, but wasn't that the whole point of a Doom Lord? She sighed. Well, this living thing is someone she cared about. She patted her back. "Hey, hey. It's okay. Well, it might not be okay now, obviously. But please, this is a dumb reason to cry..."

Doom was never good at comforting others. How was she supposed to do this when she never received one herself? Might be exaggerating, but she really did not know what to do. Pain at this point started screaming, but it was muffled. And all that Doom could do was stand and watch.

"Uh, talking, talking... Why did you come to me if I made your day worse?"
"You may be a huge a-hole but you're still my friend!"
Doom's heart fluttered. That was the nicest thing someone had said to her about being an "a-hole."

"Did you walk here after receiving that phone call?"
"Yes. I came here and called your name, but you never answered, hence why I started poking you to gain your attention."
Wow, now that is some motivation and dedication.

Her mind changed, she's definitely helping her after hearing both of those. Doom sat down and made Pain sit on her lap, still sobbing to herself. Now, this was embarrassing. The things I do for love... I MEAN FRIENDSHIP, WHAT AM I THINKING?!

"It's fine, it's fine, I'm here, I'm back."
"Glad."
"What did you want to say to me before you broke down?" Doom asked in an unusual softer tone.
"I was asking if you would allow me to live in your house for a while. I KNOW, EMBARRASSING?! Just until I get enough money."
"I'm your boss, aren't I? I can pay you."
"Oh. That would be nice."
"But you can still stay at my house if you want. And sorry for yelling at you throughout the day."
"It's fine. Thank you, Doom. I mean it."

Pain hugged Doom, and she hugged back. This was one of be few times Doom genuinely felt true happiness in her life.

Pain suddenly jumped out and stood up. "Let's go, it's getting late and cold." "Wow, that energetic? You were literally crying into my chest a few minutes ago." Doom said while standing up. "Yep! It's kinda like a natural talent..." Pain chuckled.

"Don't expect me to do this again."
"You'll definitely do this again, like with the caramel."
"Argh..."