VESTIGE

Two

I quickly pray fajr just in case my step mother came in and I didn't want her to think I don't trust Allah again. I like my mom but it's all I've got even though it's far stretched cause she has her own family now and it's complete .

I make dhikr, my daily reminder that am still alive, thanking God that I didn't die yesterday.

Yesterday actually gave me a scare and I felt lighter than I have in days.i quickly go round to make pancakes for the big family of seven which includes step father, step mother , Macy, Trevor, Noah, Lawrence, Khadijah  who was my little sister but she didn't like me for not spending time with her but I always loved her and will.

Not spending much time on that thought i finish setting the table when I peek in Khadijah's room and sit down to admire her. Deciding to make it up to her I shake her gently and put her hand to her mouth .

She looks at me with sleepy eyes but I could see the lingering bit of excitement in her eyes when I dress her up in warm clothes .

We step out into the morning breeze and I lead her to the park and lay a piece of fabric and tell her to sit.

"Dijah do you want to pray?" She shakes her head.

" Do you want to hear a story" she nodded her head so fast

"There was a man that people hated because he was in a wheel chair and the man longed for someone to understand that it was Allah's will" I say facing her while making demonstrations with my hand and when I was done she asked me a question that stomped me if the Air in my lungs.

"Tia do you love me ?" She asked tilting her head . "Of course te amore..." She giggles at the statement while I kiss her cheeks  "I love you don't ever question it and do you know who loves you more than me ? Allah does and he loves you so much and anytime you feel sad talk to Allah"

"Tia can you tell me how to talk to Allah" she says.

"There is a prayer called Salah but you will learn that when you grow older you can make dhikr by saying Allahu  Akbar, subhan Allah, alhamdulilah and last say astarfighullah when you do something Haram" I kiss her forehead and see the sun is peeking at me and I know that we have to get home fast .

Come on tia we have to get home if you don't want dad... " I say the word so quick if you weren't listening closely you wouldn't hear it " ....to punish you "

I carry tia home on my back while I hold my bag in one hand and I walk home fast competing with the sun as to who will reach home first and I reach home first, drop my bag beside the door and take tia to her room and lay her in the bed putting the blankets over her. I kiss her forehead and say with all the fierceness in my heat that I will protect you.

I head for school not wanting to go to the park again and I prayed that today goes week cause I am enthusiastic that something about today is gonna go right for the first time.

With that thought I enter the  class to see  Loren waving at me to sit with her.

"Hey Lori how're you doing" I say smiling widely at her.

" This one that you're smiling at me hope all is well with your head " she says smiling and shaking her head at me .

"Tia will you pretty please follow me for tryouts for the basketball team"

" I don't know Lori I have to get home early but I will ask Trevor and If he says yes I will go "

" Oh ok then he must say yes" she says mumbling plans about her pulling her pretty smile on him while I just laugh at what Trevor just got himself into.

"Salam" I say to my mom, when she doesn't know what the definition of a mom is by betraying me for Oscar.

Oscar walked into the house and I just cursed internally because mum was making food and was going to attract attention from Oscar and his questions.

He went over the counter pecked his wife while  asking about Macy, Noah, Trevor and dijah.

I went to my  room and mentally waited for like an hour not feeling any sense of threat I drift off to sleep.

I hear somebody knocking on my room door about to respond when the door slams the wall and my mind register s that it's just Macy being her normal annoying self.

" What do you want? " I ask her while I see her eyes looking at my room in disgust well that's her business.

" I'm hungry so come and make something for me" she says looking at her nails like it was the most amazing thing .

"Macy you just ate " I say giving her a pointed stare.

"Whatever I will report you to daddy" she said checking her nails  while  I sluggishly get up and wear some decent clothes and go make her whatever she wanted while she just stood there.

" Go and sit down in the dining room the food would soon be ready"  I just rolled my eyes in response.

"Be fast" she says in a commanding voice that felt like nails rubbing itself against metal.