Memory

Just A Memory

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"Stop this nonsense, Meg! Hindi ikaw 'to. Stop hoping that things will go back the way it used to be! Tapos na kayo 'di ba? Tumigil kana please. Maawa ka naman sa sarili mo."

Rianne feels so frustrated seeing her bestfriend coming home from that place. It should be banned from their mind, considering the effect of what happened on that mountain.

"Maniniwala ka ba kung sasabihin ko sa'yo na sinusubukan ko naman? Wala eh, sobrang hirap, sobrang bigat. Akala ko kasi hihilumin din ako ng panahon. Hindi pala."

It pained her to see Meg looking so hopeless and lost. But, what else can she do? It has been 2 years yet she still treasures that place knowing that the person who made it memorable for her is already gone in her life.

"Try harder. Wag mo lang subukan, gawin mo talaga. Stop thinking about him, stop going to the places you used to go to together. Stop it."

"Rianne... tama na. Hayaan mo na si Meg."

Josh, my boyfriend, kept on tugging me, hoping that that alone can stop my rage. No, it isn't. The amount of frustrations, hopelessness, regret, pain and sadness are building up on me. Right now, all I can think of is how to stop Meg's madness.

"Hindi Josh. Hindi na ako papayag na pumunta pa ulit siya doon sa bundok na yon. Nakalimutan mo na ba? He cheated on her! He left her for someone whom he just met at a bar. Tinapon ng gago na 'yon yung 3 years na pinagsamahan nila ni Meg para lang sa isang babae na nakilala niya sa loob ng isang gabi!"

I can still remember that fateful night. The image of my bestfriend, kneeling and begging in front of that heartless and cruel man is embedded on my mind. In fact, I don't see him as a man after what he did. He courted my bestfriend even if she kept on saying no to him. He did so many things for her and her family just so she can accept him in her life, as her partner. He promised her, her father, her mother, her grandparents and all of her family and relatives, that she will be treated as a queen and to love her the way she deserves to be loved. He gained their trust and eventually, they fell to him. It was a kind of fairytale moment for Meg.

She's a dedicated woman. She wanted to be a lawyer, the reason why she didn't allow any man to court her. There's only one person who managed to know her heart. But clearly, that one man also managed to destroy her and make her the worst version of herself.

"Rianne!"

"Wag mo kong pipigilan, Josh. She needs to come back to her senses, and you know it!"

"Rianne you need to stop. Sa tingin mo ba pumapasok sa utak ni Meg ang mga sinasabi mo? No. Sa tingin mo ba naiintindihan niya yung gusto mong iparating? No. She's blinded by her love for him that no ever explanation will go through that thick head of hers."

He's right. No matter how many times I tell her to stop, she won't. Because right this moment, we are seeing things in different perspectives. She loves that place, the reason why she kept on coming back every month. That's the place where they planned their dreams, the place where their love flourished, the only place where they can be who they want to be, without judgement and without any other eyes prying on them. It was a special place for them. But, now, it was just a meaningless mountain for him and still a magical place for her.

"I just... I j-just wanted her to be her old self again. I want her to smile and laugh again. I just wanted her to come back to what she really is."

I broke down. Meg has always been there for me. We've been best of friends ever since we were born. I know that I'll never know her pain but still, it's hurting me. Because this isn't what she wanted to be. This isn't the place and situation that she's been dreaming and planning ever since. This isn't her. She doesn't deserve this, no one does.

"She will be. But not now. Dahil hindi ikaw o ako o kung sino man ang makakapagdikta kung kailan siya magiging okay ulit, kung kailan siya maghihilom at kung kailan siya makakabalik sa kung paano siya noon bago niya nakilala yung gagong yon. She will be back but not now. Tanging siya lang ang makakatulong sa sarili niya. Kaya ang magagawa na lang natin ay ang hindi siya iwanan at pabayaan. Para pag dumating yung panahon na handa na siyang umusad, nandoon tayo para maging kasangga niya."

"If only she didn't meet him, she wouldn't be destroyed."

"Things happen, that's life. There are moments that needs to be made for us to get through to the places where we are supposed to be. Malay mo bukas o sa makalawa mapagdesisyunan na ni Meg kung paano siya makakaahon. We need to trust her and be there for her. Always."

"I guess you're right. I just can't help worrying for her."

"It's okay, I understand. But believe in her, Rianne. Time will come that she will no longer go to that place. People learn and move on. Sooner or later, she will no longer think of him as her lifeline. One day, she will no longer think of that place as their safe haven, she will only think of it as a place that she used to love and a place that she used to go to."

Before the day ends, my heart has been filled with a new hope for Meg. I believe in her, and I will do everything on my end to help her get to that healing. The future may be blurry but I know she'll get there, we'll get there. I know that the reason why she kept on going back to that place is to be reminded of the love, bond, and relationship that they had back when they were still together, before he destroyed all of it. I now understand that she just wants to feel that kind of happiness that she felt back then, that's why she can't let go of it because she believes that that was all she has. But, like what Josh said earlier...

"Everything will change eventually, she'll start moving on, for herself. One day she'll be able to look at that mountain without being reminded of what they used to be."

Memory
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