Save Your Tears

Returning & The Memorial

                               Every night I try to reach you, there's never a reply....
                                     

                           If there's a way I can see you, I am ready to die.

                         ______________________________________________________________

Yamato and the other Shinobi waited anxiously for the Anbu squad to return but to be only be greeted by a bloodied Ash Yamamoto. Yamato yelled for the others to grab the medics he, Guy and Kakashi ran to Ash's aid. "Where's Yuri?!" Yamato was ready to throw fists "Yamato, let the girl catch her breath..." Yamato growled in response, he glared at Ash. "I.. I tried, Yamato. Everything happened so quick I was able to escape thanks to Miko... I don't know where-" Yamato was about to slap Ash across the face when Guy stepped in (Finally) "Aaaarrrlight, you need to go cool off! I shall establish a rescue team to look for your friend." Guy said so confidently, Kakashi was holding back Yamato from doing something he'd regret later.

                                         ~Reaching the Village Gate~

I heard what Guy said. I was still crying, bleeding, in pain, tired, fucking done with everything.

                                                 "Don't fucking bother, Guy." I said strained everyone turned and looked at me shocked, Ash, Guy, Yamato looked like he wanted to throw fists still and then there's Kakashi. Fucking Kakashi, he just stared at me looking dead. Not exactly how I wanted to meet the son of the White Fang.... "Take this girl to the hospital, don't worry about me." I shoved the girl into Guy's arms and stormed past everyone, Yamato broke free from Kakashi's grasp and ran to me my reaction was pulling out my dagger and pointing it at him. Yamato looked heartbroken from my reaction, I stared at him with anger, hate, pain, betrayal? I'm not handling this well at all... My entire fucking squad that I was the captain of died... All but Ash. I took a shaky breath "They... They all died, they're all fucking dead. BECAUSE OF ME!" I rushed him and he fell to the ground, I stabbed the dagger next to his head I heard him whimper slightly and I grabbed his vest "ALL BECAUSE I TOLD EVERYONE TO SPLIT UP- WHY DOES EVERYONE I CARE ABOUT FUCKING DIE? WHY?! TELL ME FUCKING WHY!!" I screamed and shook him, I kept seeing my dead parents, blood and now my dead squad, I felt two hands grab me from behind I started throwing fists but I was pulled into a tight hug, my eyes widened, everything was silent, even my tears froze in place. I looked up and saw that it was Kakashi holding me in a tight embrace, his eye looked down at me, he then closed his eye and I heard him let out a sad sigh I hid my face into his chest and cried quietly. I was still shaking from adrenaline, I never had an episode in public this bad... Most of the time they're just me hyperventilating. This one is different, I don't know how long I can handle this... I felt a hand rub the back of my head, I felt my problems melt away from this... Affection is something I needed so fuckng bad but why was I afraid to let another man love me? This fear of losing people I love and what happened to my squad and my parents.... That's my excuse.  

                                              Everything went black after that.

            ____________________________________________________________

I didn't remember falling asleep at all, I shot up out of bed because I heard someone in my house at first I thought it was Naruto coming to check on me but... I didn't recognize the footsteps, I got up, threw an oversized t-shirt on and slid open my door, I smelled food... Food? I got annoyed, probably stupid-obsessed Yamato... Great now he knows where I live... But hooo damn was I wrong... I peeked around the corner and I saw... Kakashi. Kakashi? WHY IS HE IN MY HOUSE?! Before I could turn and go back to my bedroom to mentally scream at how this happened he spoke "I know you're there, Yuri." FUCK! When I looked back at him, he was looking at me, he didn't have his other eye covered and he wasn't in his usual uniform either so I guess he spent the night and slept on the couch. "H-How did you-"