MISSING, jongsang

20 ; changed

dragging his legs out of history class, yeosang begun making his way to the library for lunch. usually he wouldn't, usually he'd sit with jongho in the cafeteria, however he didn't think that was an option now as the boy had completely avoided him today.

at first, yeosang assumed that perhaps jongho was just late to school, explaining why he didn't meet up with him at their usual spot this morning. but that soon revealed to not be the case — as much as he wished for it to be, since getting stood up wasn't ever nice — after he had caught the younger leaving his class for break, calling out for him, just to be faced with a side eye and a back walking away from him.

it hurt. god, it really fucking hurt to know that the person yeosang relied on the most right now no longer cared for his company. and for what? he didn't even know.

therefore, when yeosang entered the doors of the library, eyes landing on two familiar heads of hair, he rashly decided on joining their table.

although a fraction of yeosang regretted his choices immediately at hongjoong and mingi's questionable stares, he still mustered up an ounce of confidence within him to slide himself into a spare chair opposite them. yeosang gulped anxiously, before starting, "uh, hey..."

"hi, yeosang," hongjoong greeted him first. "this is definitely a... surprise."

yeosang glanced in between the two, then looked away. "oh... it is okay if i sit with you guys, though... right?"

"yeah, of course, it is!" hongjoong assured, frantically nodding his head up and down. "we just... didn't expect to see you, is all."

yeosang briefly hummed in acknowledgment, failing in spewing out a response, which inevitably lead to silence dropping over them, the hushed voices surrounding them now seeming louder.

"so, yeosang... how have you been?" mingi eventually asked, after a good while of observing the latter male.

"i've been good- well, the best i can be since, you know..." a great way to make things more awkward than they already are, kang yeosang.

"that's real nice to hear." hongjoong smiled gently, a momentary wave of comfort surging through yeosang at that.

"what's the deal with those boys you're always hanging around with now, though?" mingi blurted out, taking yeosang aback. "i mean- i'm glad you've found yourself some friends, but—"

"but nothing." hongjoong sent his boyfriend a frustrated glare, almost as if he saw the remark coming.

feeling out of place in that moment, yeosang cleared his throat, the legs of his chair loudly scraping against the floor as he stood. "i'm gonna, um, go, i think—"

"yeosang—" hongjoong tried, yet it was up to no avail.

"it's okay. thank you guys for, y'know... checking up on me and stuff, but... i have somewhere to be now that i think of it," yeosang lied. and in reality, their short-lived words of comfort didn't mean anything to him anymore.

"ah... i see. well, uh, take care of yourself."

yeosang nodded his head curtly, before gladly turning his back on the two boys. even though him and san hadn't spoken much around in school, solely for jongho's sake, the pear-haired boy was the only person he could think of who wouldn't treat his presence like a burden. yet, once thinking logically, two things stood in yeosang's way of contacting san — the awful school wifi, and the lack of energy his legs had to look around the college building in hope of bumping into him.