-
(mw)
The two of us had decided for me to just visit his house, me still yet to find a flat. Harry had assured me Lux and Freezy would be out for the day.
It felt weird to be walking through the flat and into his bedroom again, a sense of nostalgia taking over me. I felt myself smile slightly, memories of this exact walk filling my head.
"You want a drink or anything?" He asked me, tone soft. I shook my head no, "I'll be two minutes then."
Harry left the room, smell of his spray following him. I sat myself on the edge of his bed, not made- not that he ever even made the effort to make it. His room wasn't as messy as I remembered it to be, things seeming to be placed in random places; as if he'd shoved it all away five minutes before i'd turned up.
The set up of his room overall was still the same, desk next to his bed with multiple screens. Drawers at the end of his bed, TV taking over the top. He'd replaced the framed picture though that was once an image of us at a festival- me on his shoulders and him with a smile i'd never seen so wide. Now, a picture of him and the two Cal's sat in its spot, new frame thankfully.
Harry returned a few moments later, two cups in his hand. He set them down at his desk before sitting at his gaming chair.
"I brought you one anyway," he started, gesturing to the glass filled with some sort of juice, "you always used to say no and nick mine so-"
"Harry it's fine. Thankyou."
I sucked in a breath, an awkwardness filling the air. My hands placed themselves between my legs, tightly together.
"Oh nelly," he whispered to himself. He ruffled his hair a few times. "How've you been?"
I looked up at him, his eyes pinned directly onto me. I gave him a slight smile. "Okay. How have you been?"
"Yeah good," he nodded.
"I was talking to the girls the other day," I said softly, he nodded, urging me to continue, "they said you found the distance hard- you know, when I was flying between here and New York."
Harry sighed, resting his cheek against his knuckle.
"Did you not?"
I nodded instantly, "Of course, you know I did."
"It was shit," he said bluntly. "I feel like last year I saw you for all of- what? Two months. Added together."
"It's my job though, I couldn't help it. I can't help it if I want to make money."
He only shrugged.
"Besides, if you would have told me-" I tried to say, a scoff leaving his lips straight away.
"Told you?" He laughed, "Millie I practically begged you to stay with me every time you had to leave. I tried to come and visit you; when you were away for months. Why am I gonna do that if the distance doesn't bother me?"
I looked at him, his face flushing somewhat. He licked his lips, tongue then rubbing over his teeth.
"Is this why you said you didn't wanna be with me anymore?" I then asked him. "The distance? Because we could've easily worked it out-"
"It's not," he shook his head, interrupting me. "It wasn't the distance Mil."
I felt myself huff, hands dragging themselves down my face, thankfully I hadn't worn any makeup.
"Then what?" I stressed, "I just can't wrap my head around why Harry. I've run myself mad trying to list things that I've done to make you change your mind."
"I already told you, that night, that you didn't do anything."
"So you just decided, over night, that you didn't wanna be with me?" I scoffed, "because I can remember clearly, the night before it seemed like you loved me more than ever."
"What- I loved you when it was ending. I just couldn't do it anymore."
"Couldn't do it with me? Or couldn't do it with anyone?" I asked him, his face seemingly dropping. He tried to shrug it off. "Couldn't do it with me."
He shook his head, pushing his chair abit closer towards me. The boy attempted to grab my hands, I pulled them away.
"So all this time, I've had all these questions held together, wondering why. And turns out it was just me in general."
"No. It's not like that-"
"So you haven't been with someone else since then?"
"No, I have but-"
"When?" I asked him, he sighed, thumb and index finger rubbing his eyes.
"January," he mumbled. My eyes widened, something between a laugh and a gasp leaving my lips.
"January?" I repeated, the boy nodding once. "We broke up at the end of December Harry."
"I know, but if you just listen-"
I shook my head, a few hairs falling from my clipped back hair. I blinked back the tears that almost started to fall.
"And how long was that for?" I whispered. Harry shrugged. "Might as well tell me now Harry."
"She finished it in April. Saw our messages and assumed- well you know."
"Saw our messages from December?"
"Didn't delete them-"
"That's besides the point anyway," I continued, "Not even a month later you were getting it on with another girl. And, it'd still be a thing if she hadn't snooped her way through your phone?"
He didn't answer. He pulled the hood of his sweatshirt over his head.
"Jesus Christ," I mumbled to myself. Tears brimming at my eyes yet again. I sniffled, hands coming up to wipe away the tears that had started to fall.
"Millie-" Harry spoke softly, attempting again to grab me. I help my hands up, standing from his bed and dusting down my clothes. "You don't need to go."
"I do," I laughed, more tears falling. "I just- I don't even know."
"Please-"
I shook my head, pointing to the drink on his desk before walking out. "Might as well ask her if she wants it. She's had everything else."
-
Tal💓💗💞
Freya🥰
Faith🤍
Tal💓💗💞
how'd it go?
Freya🥰
let me know if you
want to come for a
cuddle?
Me
it's fine
Faith🤍
bullshit
Tal💓💗💞
faith
Faith🤍
no. i'm sorry
but it's true
Faith🤍
that's not how she'd
reply if she was actually fine
Me
faith, it's okay x
Me
honestly
Freya🥰
do you want me to come
or you can come here?
Freya🥰
we don't have to talk about
it. i just know i wouldn't
wanna be alone
Me
i'll come to you?
Freya🥰
of course angel
Freya🥰
just walk straight in
Me
thankyou
Freya🥰
don't thank me,
you need someone
it's what a friend does
