Mia's Story

Chapter 4

MUST READ!!!!!!!!

Just a warning yall, this chapter mainly focuses on a part of her history. It quite hard hitting and emotional. Mentions of: rape, abuse and harassment. Uses derogatory words towards women.

The door clicked shut and the atmosphere was instantly relaxed. My leg had stopped irritably drumming on the floor and  my sharp eyes were focused on M, instead of the both of them. 

"As I was saying, he might not be able to recognise him if this person joined after Mr Pool left, but we can always shoot our chance,"

I nodded. 

M wrote something down in her notebook she carried everywhere, I swear she uses it all the bloody time. I tried to peer over her many ornaments that covered the table but I couldn't see. 

I wondered what M thought of knowing the fact I led him on. I wondered if she thought I was a whore. I wondered if she thought i'm like what I would have been like if I had been sold to the highest bidder. A sex slave. 

Sometimes I wonder that too. I hate to admit it but I find my release in sex and pleasure. I need a release quite often, which doesn't help the matter. If I had been sold and been forced into sex would I enjoy it as I do now? Or would I get the sick feeling in my stomach afterwards? Would I have learned to enjoy it? Would I have willingly become a whore, because that's what I feel like I am now.

I have so many regrets in life, so many downfalls. So much happiness (well as far as happiness goes for me) but instantly brought down the next second. My world is dark, dangerous and hella scary. Maybe if my parents didn't put me in the nearest, shittiest orphanage it wouldn't have been infiltrated by wannabe gangsters and I wouldn't have been taken in a van across borders to be forced to live in a sick household where I was treated like shit. 

Maybe if that didn't happen I would still be a virgin by thirteen.

It was only one night, but one night was enough. 

Flashback:

My scratty doll was pulled from my hand and chucked against the crumbling sandstone wall. I looked up at him and he smiled widely and stared through me. It was a look he always gave me whenever he complemented my outfit or my hair or makeup. It was a look of a paedophile. Yes, I wasn't stupid I knew straight away from the first glance of being hauled out of the van with my hand shackled behind me. He stood on the porch. I was brought towards him and the leader of the people in the van came forwards and exchanged greetings with the man on the porch. Money was received and a few laughs shared. I knew I had been sold. The leader of the people in the van came towards me, he lifted my chin as he always did and smiled. I remembered the words he said to me clear as day "be a good girl for him, Mia, or you know what will happen,"

I had been with the man for two weeks. He thought if he spent time with me and 'got to know me better' I would trust him. I didn't trust him in the slightest. I lived under his rule, his order and his harsh words. He called me words i'd never heard before, he called me a whore, a slut, slag, sex kitten, bitch and so many more even before I had even had sex before. 

As he stared down at me and lifted my chin. I knew by now not to flinch because what was coming for me if I did was sickening to even think about. 

"Come with me, beautiful,"

I knew it was coming. Why was I shocked? Maybe because kids my age shouldn't have to worry about this shit? My lips trembled and I tried to use my hand to cover it before he noticed. It was too late.