Dents

[+] Murdoc Is God

2D and I woke up earlier than usual.

He made us a couple of mugs filled with the usual mediocre coffee. We drank them cuddled together on the couch. We discussed the album eagerly over a cigarette. It had been released mere hours ago and it was already striking up hundreds of thousands of hits.

The door shook thunderously on its hinges, interrupting our conversation. The sound of it rattling against the frame was so unexpected that I leapt off the couch and nearly tripped over the cluttered coffee table. It had practically scared me out of my skin. I wasn't inclined to answer it after whoever it was had given me such a start.

"What in the bloody 'ell is goin' on 'ere?! You lot change the locks on me?!"

My heart turned into deadweight.

2D gazed up at me anxiously from the sofa. His posture was tense. He clenched his jaw firmly. His expression was unreadable.

There was more cursing and banging from the direction of the entryway. I took a deep breath, bracing myself. I made my way to the kitchen and opened the door.

"What is this shite anyway, ungrateful bas - Saoirse!"

"Nice to see you, too," I remarked, "And no, we didn't change the locks."

I don't know what I expected. What I got was certainly not it. 

Murdoc was looking as green and lumpy as ever. A dubious grin stretched wide across his face. He was dressed in a soiled jumpsuit that was likely orange once. It was far from anything resembling that now.

Except, he wasn't alone.

He was strapped to a massive furry beast with towering horns sharp enough to gouge a man to death. It had glowing red eyes and blew puffs of crimson smoke whenever it breathed.

"Um, what the hell is that?"

"What?"

He looked at me as if I'd grown two heads.

"This?" 

He gestured to the enormous demonic yak he was roped around. I nodded.

"This's Madonna."

"I'm pretty sure it's not."

"Christ, that's her name! I named 'er after that frisky whats-'er-face bird. You know 'er."

I sighed. I wasn't getting anywhere with this, so I just sort of stared at him and scratched my head.

"What in the bloody 'ell are you waitin' for? Cut me loose!"

"I guess I probably should, huh," I grumbled, reaching into my pocket for a switchblade 2D had loaned me for self defense. I didn't think it was necessary to have something like that since it could easily go sideways in a bad situation. He was strangely insistent on it. I used it more as a utility tool than anything else.

I grabbed hold of the thick line of rope fastened to the top of Madonna's hairy back and began sawing through it until it unraveled. A heap of large multicolored tarps rolled off of her and onto the pavement beneath. The second that Murdoc was entirely unveiled, I was assaulted by a horrible stench.

"Good God! What is that smell?!"

"Riiight, see, about that -"

"No. You can not come in the house like that. Oh, oh my God," I suppressed a gag.

"At least allow me the privilege to explain myself, would ya?"

Murdoc hacked until something like phlegm came up. He spit it carelessly onto the sidewalk. He brushed himself off. A flurry of dust and soot came loose from his sodden clothes.