Shadows (Book 2 of the Zara's Wolf Trilogy) BWWM

14. Too Late

As I cry into my hands, a part of me is dying. Brianna kneels next to me, rubbing my back, and trying not to tremble herself. I cling to myself, feeling vulnerable in my nakedness and in desperate need of something to cover myself.

This can't be happening.

A scream of agony behind us squeezes my eyes shut as my hands reach up to my ears in an attempt to block out the rogue's final cry of life.

The silence that follows makes my head spin. I fall to my hands and knees, gasping for air, bile rising up my throat as thoughts and images swirl around and around in my head. Evan punching him, screaming threats at him. The look in his eyes, dead set on killing him without remorse, flash before me making me cringe and my stomach twist painfully.

We just killed someone.

They said rogue attacks were rare. This has been the second incident in a matter of hours. How many more must there be before it ends? How much more blood must be shed before it will come to an end? How many lives will die at the hands of my mate and friends?

I shake my head at the thought. I'm afraid to face any of them now. I can't look at them the same way knowing that they have killed someone in cold blood with their bare hands.

"You should've been in the safe house with Ali," Brianna murmurs softly beside me as she continues to rub my back. "Rick should've known you weren't ready--"

"If I hadn't been here, he could've killed you," I snap, brushing her arm away from me.

I don't want her touching me. I'm disgusted with myself, with her, with both of us. For walking away and letting Evan and Keith manage the rogue--for allowing them to kill him, even if it was the only option.

She stares at me without flinching, but her eyes are soft as my words sink in. She knows I'm right, but we can't erase what has happened.

Maybe I wasn't ready? Maybe I should've been put in the safe house? Does it even matter now? That rogue is dead, and nothing will change that fact.

I dig my fingers into the cool damp soil as I take deep cleansing breaths. Its earthy fragrance reminds me of Evan and the knot in my stomach doubles.

Is this what it means to be a shifter? To live with a pack and kill other shifters that jeopardize our well-being? Is there no judicial system to lock up potentially dangerous shifters? Is capital punishment the only means of solving threats, even before a murder has been made?

Is this a world I want to be a part of? Is this everything my parents feared that I would become involved in when I discovered what I really am? Could they have anticipated something like this happening?

Were they right in their decision to keep the truth from me by suppressing my wolf so I'd never have to witness the murder of a stranger by the hand of the one person meant to make me happy for the rest of my life?

It sounds too far-fetched, but maybe they did consider the dangers I might face as a shape-shifter?

As my racing heart begins to relax, Rick's large copper wolf trots up to us. He looks from Brianna to me in an emotional heap on the ground. Huffing, he glides past us. A minute later, his howl cuts through the forest, announcing the kill.

The sound of it makes me shiver as I roll back on my heels and stand up, rubbing my arms.

Rick must have shifted as I hear his voice along with Keith and Evan as they approach us.

"Stay at your posts until Alpha gives the all-clear," Rick says twenty feet behind me.

I feel his gaze on me as he approaches. I don't like it. I can tell he's scrutinizing me, determining my worth.