Beauty in Red | NaNoWriMo 2021

Chapter Five: Marie

Somehow, I found myself in the garden, hiding in the hedge maze. There was a bench, about midway through the puzzle, that my sister and I had found solace in when we were younger, and hiding from the adults. It was our safe place, the only spot in the entire world where we could be free, even just temporarily.

There were two large rose bushes planted on either side of the bench. Andrea and I had spent many days sitting here, smelling the roses and reading novels side by side on the bench.

In my panicked haze, it must have been the place I felt safest to run to.

As I collapsed, breathless, on the bench, I could no longer hold in my sobs. It wasn't necessarily about the engagement--that had been a shock, to be sure, but not wholly unexpected. At twenty-three, I was nearing the age when men would stop looking at me as a potential wife, and would only be interested in taking me as a lover. I had been waiting for the day, and I often wondered if my father was hesitant to part with the only hunter he had that was equipped enough to take out starving Seconds.

Because I had always known, since I began my training at age eight, that once I married, I would no longer be permitted to sneak off at night and hunt the bloodthirsty beings that plagued our world. But with Xavier being allowed into the inner circle, and being groomed as my father's heir, there had been some small part of me that had hoped father would tell Xavier the truth about me.

It seemed father was still too worried about losing grip on his power over the order to even consider it.

I cried for Saela knew how long, but when my tears finally ran dry, my eyes were puffy and swollen, and the sun had moved along in the sky. The bench had grown uncomfortable at some point, but I'd been too wrapped up in my panic to really notice. Now I shifted, lying on my back and looking up at the clear blue sky.

This was not the end of the world, and I knew that. Though I had hoped somehow father would find a way to allow me to hunt forever, I never truly expected any such thing from him. I would be okay.

"Marie?" a soft, feminine voice called out, and I bit back a groan at the intrusion. I did not need anyone seeing me cry, especially not Andrea, who would see my tears and not understand the reason they fell.

But of course, she rounded the corner, wearing her favorite pale yellow gown, with pastel pink accents and lace across the neckline. While I preferred simple dresses, Andrea always wore heavy gowns, with tightly laced corsets and miles of skirts. It was a spectacle for her to dress every morning, and often, she was late to breakfast because of it.

"Oh, Marie," she gasped, lifting her skirts high and running towards me. I stood, knowing that even as annoyed as I was at her finding me, I needed her right now. She would not understand the whole truth of it, but she would understand enough.

Andrea's arms swept around me, pulling me into a tight embrace that made more tears find their way out. She held me, cooing softly in my ear as I finally managed to calm myself down.

"How did you know where to find me?" I asked, voice still thick with tears.

"I always know where to find you," Andrea answered. "This is our place, remember?"

I nodded, and Andrea guided me down onto the bench. "I'm sorry."

"Hush," she said. "You are allowed to be upset. Father said he accidentally let slip in front of you that you are engaged, and that you were devastated at the news."

"Yeah," I said, half-heartedly. "It was...shocking, to say the least."

"How silly of him to not think before he spoke," she said, tsking and shaking her head. "He should have waited until dinner tonight to announce it--that was his original plan, you know."

I very seriously doubted that. Father had invited me to the meeting of the order to tell me then and there, because he knew I would cause a scene. Though I wanted to be angry with him for having no tact at all, and not giving any thought to warning me beforehand, there was a part of me, the part that so desperately wished for his approval, that would end up forgiving him before I was truly ready.

"I should have realized when mother was making a huge fuss about Lord Xavier last week," I said, retreating into the part of myself Andrea knew--the only part she would ever know. "She never cares when new lords move to Emery; that should have been my first warning."

Andrea snorted--an entirely unladylike thing to do, and I grinned. "I don't think she realized how obvious she was being. But you were preoccupied--I'm surprised you even remember that conversation."

I'd been exhausted that day, in my mother's sitting room. We had been cooped up inside all day, practicing our sewing, and it had been the morning after a truly exhausting hunt. I imagined I looked half-dead to my mother and sister, constantly dozing off and stabbing myself with my needle.

"I'm sorry you had to learn that way," Andrea said, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and hugging me close. "But now that you know, isn't it truly exciting?"

I nodded, smiling for her benefit. "It is exciting. I wonder when I will get to meet him."

Andrea pulled away, clapping excitedly. "Oh! Father is going away to meet with the king about some boring thing or another, and he said he has invited Lord Xavier over for lunch the day before he is set to leave! You will meet him formally then!"

"That will be wonderful," I said. It had been a while since father had last gone on a mission, but it didn't surprise me at all that he said he would be meeting with the king while he was gone. The trip to Freidmont Palace was a long one, and on the rare occasion the king did summon father, it often was for months at a time.

"I cannot wait to plan your wedding; oh, and the ball! There will be so many Ladies and Lords who will want to attend. And the flowers," she rambled, continuing on for a good while. I responded when I knew I needed to, but for the most part, I let Andrea talk herself out. She was excited, and that allowed me to feel some semblance of excitement as well, but what she didn't know, and what I would never tell her was that it felt as if father had placed the collar of the inner circle around my throat, and tossed away the key.