Four Men and a Baby

Two Years Ago Today

Muren was right when he thought that helping Licheng woo Meifang would be the worst decision of his life. It hadn't even been a week since he agreed to this absurd pretense scheme and he was already regretting it. In the past three days alone, Licheng had kissed him accidentally on the bed, taken at least five inappropriate pictures of him while touching him, back hugged him out of the blue, and right now he has him pinned to the glass wall in their office cafeteria staring at the door, just waiting for someone...anyone to show up and spot them in the compromising position that he has set. All Muren can do is try and not get lost in his eyes while his heart flutters out of his chest with every breath of Licheng that he feels, hot, on his face. It takes everything in him to stand straight and hold his position while trying his best to avoid looking down at Licheng's lips and the stupid smile that is plastered on his face.

Yongjie was right, Muren thinks now. They had met Yongjie only a few times since Xingsi had started dating him. But it didn't take him long to poke his nose into Muren's business.

"You are helping him so much, are you sure you don't have feelings for him?" Yongjie had asked him and Muren only hesitated for a second before refuting such an absurd question. But of course, that slight hesitation gave him out and Yongjie had smirked at him in return. Muren glared at him as he added him to his imaginary kill list. Yongjie was quick-witted and figured out his secret. He was instantly promoted to the top of the list. Muren just has to find a way to keep his distance from Yongjie now. Avoid the man, avoid the confrontation, avoid the feelings. He isn't sure he would succeed though. Just like how he has failed the same tactic with Licheng.

The same Licheng, he had actively been trying to keep away from since he had developed a crush on him a year ago. And somehow ended up here, in his arms, against the wall, no way to escape.

Licheng moves in closer when he hears footsteps approaching. There is almost zero space between them now and Muren can hardly think straight.  Licheng catches his intense stare for less than a second before pulling back. His purpose is served. They had been spotted. Licheng thanks him quickly and walks out abruptly leaving him weak in the knees, stumbling towards the table for support.

Muren realized then what a big miss he had gotten himself into. This would just hurt him while Licheng played around with his feelings unconsciously.

He sits down, trying to calm his still thumping heart. All the doubts he had had so far, all the times he had tried to convince himself that it was just a little crush, all his attempts to not fall for his colleague and roommate went down the drain in that instant.

He was now very clear of his feelings. And he was stuck.

He knows now that he is madly in love with his best friend.

He had always been attracted to both men and women and had known this since high school but had never been brave enough to date or even fall for a guy before. Perhaps it was because he had never met anyone like Licheng before.

When Muren met Licheng as a new employee in their office, he was annoyed. Everything about Licheng irritated him...his good looks, his charming nature, his bright as the sunshine smile, and even his amazing talent. He was so good at everything he did and it bothered Muren that he was unable to control his emotions around him. It also didn't help his case when they slowly became close and then roommates.

How much ever Licheng teased him or pranked him, he equally cared for him, and was kind and protective of him. But Muren was adamant that he would never fall for him. He had stubbornly promised himself to never be one of those guys who fell in love with their straight best friend and suffered through heartbreak for the rest of their lives. So he had kept his feelings and emotions in check. At least until today.

When Licheng brought up Meifang and begged his help in pursuing her, Muren  was initially crushed and dejected. But like a fool, he took it as a challenge. If Licheng settled down with his love then, he thought, maybe he could get over his stupid crush and move on.

All it took to set his heart blazing was a mere glimpse of a fake relationship. with Licheng. After knowing and tolerating Licheng and his antics for almost 3 years, he has finally given in to his feelings and accepted the fact that he is indeed in love with his straight best friend. But the timing couldn't be worse. He is of course in the middle of helping the said best friend build a relationship with the love of his life Mei Fang.

It was just downhill after that. He could go back on his word and stop helping him but he also could no longer just pretend to be in love. It got too real for him and he got swayed further and further by the fake affection Licheng bestowed on him.

But of course, he could never confess his feelings because Licheng didn't feel the same and also because he eventually did end up in a relationship with Mei Fang by the end of all the facade.

Although that didn't last longer than a few months and Licheng even found the love of his life twice after that...only to end up forgotten in a few months again.

It had been nearly been two years since then and nothing had changed for Muren. He still felt the same and still hid his feelings from Licheng.

                                  —————————

"What do you mean she's your daughter?" Xingsi questions Licheng as Muren retracts into his room after Licheng's confession about the kid.

"It means exactly that. She is my daughter."

"Who is the mother? Where is she?"

"She will be back soon."

It's the last thing Muren hears of the conversation before closing the door to his room.

He walks onto his balcony as he tries to process everything that has happened since he woke up.

Licheng had gone to visit his family a few days ago as there was some kind of an emergency. And he had now returned with a baby girl in tow.

What was the emergency? How did he end up with the kid? What happened to the mother? Does his family know about all this?      

There were just too many questions running around in his head. Questions he wanted to know and he didn't want to know the answers of. All he can think of is that Licheng has a daughter now.      

A daughter he hasn't known about for the past two years...but is now suddenly part of his life. Two years... while Muren had been struggling with his feelings for his roommate and best friend who is also straight by the way and apparently going around making babies with women. And now he wants to raise the baby....in front of him...in their shared home.

Why is this happening? What will happen when the mother comes back into his life?

He would obviously leave. Once the mother is back, to claim her family, he would leave to live with them together. He knows Licheng. Once he commits to something or someone he would never fail them. And now that he had decided to be part of Meili's life, Muren knew that he no longer would be part of Licheng's life as he wished to be.

If he had ever thought that seeing Licheng with a new girlfriend every 6 months was heartbreaking, he was up for a rude awakening. Because watching him doting on his daughter would be even more gut-wrenching.

The last ray of hope that Muren ever had of having his feelings returned was now shattered. His heart sinks as he lets the tears fall freely now.