Breaking Point

Chapter 13: Get out of my head

"Had a nice nap?" Zaid said, looming over his waking attacker.  She took a sharp breath and, seeing Zaid over her, scrambled as much as she could and found herself cornered.  She panicked and started checking her arms and legs.  While she was asleep, Zaid had removed a whole slew of gadgets from her polished dark silver armor that he was glad he didn't have to deal with in their fight.

"Stay back!" she shouted in English, in an unfamiliar accent.

Zaid had removed most of his own armor before she woke up, leaving only the black undergarment that lined it.  His light skin, rough with patchy dark hair, was visible through a hole in the chest and another one on his stomach.  He had carried her out of the red-lit machine city back to the train platform because he thought the red light was too unfriendly.  "Oh good, you do speak English.  Makes everything easier.  I don't plan to hurt you."  He lifted his shirt to reveal where he had been stabbed, the former wound hardly being a scar at this point.  "And I doubt you could really hurt me if you wanted to.  I just came here from the Command Sector to build some parts they need to fix something.  If you can help me get this done then I can get out of your hair."

The woman spat.  "Command Sector," she said derisively.  "They can drink the piss.  Where were they when the scorpion got in?  It starts spraying and everyone goes berserk.  Instead of sending help, they shut off the train.  Left us here like unwanted pet."

"Huh," Zaid responded.  "I can't really speak for what happened because I haven't been here for long, but you were only dealing with one of them.  They had a whole nest in the main antenna, queen and all.  Really nasty infestation.  It's all cleared out now.  Had to cut off my own leg.  Don't worry, it grew back.  When I killed the queen, all the rest of them pretty much died.  Not much to worry about now.  But maybe, yeah, they can 'drink the piss,' but that's not what I'm here for.  Now can we get those machines . . . "

Her brows furrowed and she held up her hand.  "Wait, wait, too fast.  So you say they did not abandon us?"

Zaid shrugged.  "I don't know.  I wasn't there.  I didn't ask.  Next point?"

"What do you mean, didn't ask?  They sent you here to make new parts but didn't say why they couldn't go themselves?"

"They didn't tell me much at all.  Just something about there were rippers here before and that getting stung without treatment was somehow worse than death.  Frankly I don't know what I expected.  Part of me was expecting, I don't know, zombies."

Ugh, what am I doing?  I just need her to cooperate and here I am making jokes about horror fiction.

Her gaze turned away and the color drained from her face.  She went silent.

Dammit, I offended her.  Way to go, asshole.

"You can drink the piss, too, monster," she said as she hoisted herself up and tried to shove Zaid to the side as she passed, like trying to shove a boulder.  Zaid grabbed her wrist.  "DON'T touch me," she threatened, "or next time I cut off your hand."

Zaid let go and the woman stormed off through the doors to the machine city.  He held back any remarks, conflicted in his mind between as if you could threaten me? I'll just grow it back! Maybe next time I'll rip yours off! and that woman must have gone through something terrible and I just brought it all back.

Yeah, maybe I should drink the piss.

He started putting his armor back on.  Slipping his foot into the ankle deep boot.  Clipping the shin guard and calf guard together around his lower leg.  He proceeded upward with attaching his armor.  Maybe I don't need her at all.  Maybe I can just plug into something and find out how to get what I want without her.

What the hell did she go through?  What did I remind her of?

Hopefully she won't be an obstacle.  If she is, I can just kill her.  She may have fancy moves but I was just holding back.

Why the hell would I want to kill her?  No, I don't do that anymore.  I can't afford to.  It would send me back to the place I never want to go again.  My worst nightmare.

Then how do I deal with her if she's an obstacle?  I have to do something with her.

"Argh, just stop it!"  Zaid scolded himself.  "Get out of my head, you evil bastard.  I know you're not in there right now, but you're there and I need you out!"

The memory of Draygon's hissing psychic voice pierced Zaid's ears.  You and I, we're the same.

"No.  I bet you would have killed her."

No.  I would have found out everything about her first.  Found her mental weakness and exploited it to make her my ally and accomplish my goal.

"And then what after?" Zaid asked derisively.  "Dispose of her?"

Only if she proved to be a liability or a loose end.

Zaid scoffed through his nose.  "People aren't disposable, no matter how much you think they are."

Bold words for someone who doesn't care enough to ask for anyone's name, who they are or even thank them for what they've done for you.

"THAT'S ENOUGH!" Zaid shouted as he threw the pauldron he was about to put on his shoulder.  "YOU DON'T GET TO TELL ME WHAT I DO AND DON'T CARE ABOUT."  His huffing breaths seemed to have their own growl to them before he was able to slow down.  "You're not even real.  I'm imagining your voice right now."  He had been pacing in his frustration, and now realizing it, he stopped and glanced over to where his pauldron had landed.

I can't afford to get mad like this, he thought as he went over to pick it up.  People die when I get mad like this.  But the real question is if there was a point to this.  I was trying to recruit her to help.  I know it's coming from what I think Draygon would do, but would it be wrong to try and recruit her by getting to know her?

I can't get to know her.  Anyone I get to know ends up dying, unless they're extraordinary.

He pictured the fight.  The graceful way she moved to avoid and deflect his swings was extraordinary.  Like Rellik, but without the taunting.  Maybe she'll be okay.  I don't have to open up.  I just need to not be closed off.

A sigh escaped his mouth as his resolve formed.  Okay.  I'll start by figuring out what I can do without her, and I'll try to act like a real person if I need her.  He shook his head.  Try.