possibility days | JENLISA

from zero to everything

I've got a heavy little secret
I'm about to fall in love with you
- let me take you away, wilhelm tell me

It's only a kiss.

It isn't even a surprise, because they mention it early on: So this is a story about two girls in love, they say. Last chance to get out. Lisa remembers standing there and smiling, taking the script and saying, I don't mind. After all, it's not like a girl like her is about to balk at a challenge like that.

"It's a good story," she remembers saying, too. "I'll do it." There's clapping and hugging and people saying, We can't wait to tell you who you're working with, and she doesn't even remember being nervous, at the very least. Whoever it is, she just thinks, I'll do it anyway.

All considered, Lisa does not have a problem with it. Until she meets Jennie.

It's not even that she doesn't like her – Jennie is one of the good ones. Can act with a quirk of her brow, or the quiver of her lip, and don't even get her started about that thing she could do with her eyes.

(And then, there's Jennie's laugh.)

Yet despite being actually all that, she is never late – Lisa's heard horrible diva gossip about actresses their age, and truth be told, she'd braced herself for something like that with her, only to be proven wrong. Despite the ungodly hours, Jennie has always seemed to manage her temper, and she is always considerate, always walking around with an extra cup of coffee for Lisa.

What's not to like, really? She has great eyes, and is actually, quite absurdly beautiful. She never touches Lisa without telling her first where her hands are going to be (I am going to touch you here, then here – is that okay babe?), and she thinks it's so polite and endearing, like Jennie is always on her side.

Relax, she would murmur, hand high on the taller's thigh. This is just me.

Yet always Lisa shivers anyway.

The first time around, she chalks it up to the outdoor weather – their first kiss happens on a lakeshore, surrounded by trees, and they're damp from the rain. The skies are overcast and the wind is chilly, and Lisa just thinks, of course it's the weather when Jennie moves in to kiss her finally and she shivers under the brunette's cold hands wrapped gently around her neck.

They do it in three takes, and afterwards Jennie wraps the towel she is handed around Lisa first.

"You're shaking," she just says, off the question in the taller's eyes. "You all right?"

"Yeah," she manages eventually. "You?"

Jennie smiles. "That nose bump thing was a killer," she says instead, leaning back in to press a playful peck on her cheek, laughing as she pulls away to start walking back to her trailer. "See you later at dinner!"

Lisa nods, swallowing hard, watching her move away, a hand against her cheek. Of course, it's only a kiss. And it's only a show, and it's only acting. Yet how to ignore the drumming inside her chest at that?

It's not even that she doesn't like Jennie – it's that she does.

(It's only a kiss. But it is a problem,

nevertheless.)

*

Weeks pass between the shoot and the episode airing, and Lisa watches it over dinner at Jennie's flat. They're all housed near the studio where they have been taping these days, and though she lives three floors down, Lisa doesn't mind hanging out, not really. The weeks between have been comfortable at best – like Jennie's almost a friend, which shouldn't be so bad, considering how they have been spending more hours in a day pretending to be lovers.