HisokaxReader
Hisoka loses a fight and y/n has to comfort him
First Person
I was reading on the couch when Hisoka came home. All I heard was the door slam and a heavy sigh. He's been in a bad mood ever since he lost a fight last week. As good as he is at fighting, he always takes it really hard if he loses.
Hisoka walks into the living room, flops down on the opposite couch and closes his eyes. "Sokie," I said. "Come here, I need to talk to you." He opens his eyes and slowly gets up off the couch. He sits down next me and heaves a deep sigh. I put my arm around him and rubbed his chest with my other hand.
"Do you wanna tell me what's wrong?" I say. He doesn't even look at me. "Don't you already know, darling~" He replies sullenly. "Yes, but I want to hear you say it. I want to understand what's bothering you so much."
"I lost, that's what's wrong. I'm a failure." He responds.
I fight the urge to roll my eyes. Instead I sigh deeply. He's an amazing fighter and he really thinks that just because he's lost one fight he's a loser? It's irritating how negative he can sometimes be. But I'm here for a reason, and that's to comfort him. No matter what he's going through I have to be there for him.
"You're not a failure, okay? You only lost one fight."
"It's been years since i've lost a fight, y/n." Dramatic ass.
"So?" I ask. I want to understand why it's so important to him.
"So~" the jester says, rolling his eyes. "I never lose. It's not in my nature. I thought I was the best." He won't look at me. Instead his eyes drop onto his lap where he's picking at his cuticles.
"Darling," I say, putting my hand on his chin and facing him toward me. "Just because you've lost one fight doesn't mean you're a failure. I don't remember his name, but I remember reading about the guy you were fighting. All he wants is to get to the top. You, however, are already at the top." Hisoka gives a glare that says Seriously?
"What? You are! You're one of the best!"
"Obviously not anymore," He crosses his arms.
"Hisoka." I say sternly. "No one is the best. Some people are better then others at certain things. That's not your fault. Or anyone's fault. It's just the way it is."
"I can't accept that." Hisoka raises his voice as he stands up. He starts pacing around the living room. "Listen," I honestly have no idea what to say to him. How can I get him to understand that he's not a failure? He's been working his way up for all of these years only to lose one fight and give up.
"What can you say to me that will make it better? Honestly," Hisoka says as he turns around to face me. "Why do you fight, Hisoka?" He raises his eyebrows in surprise. Shouldn't I know this by now? Shouldn't I know him well enough to not have to ask?
"Because I'm good at it and I want to get better," He sits down on the couch again and puts his head in his hands. "I wanted to be the best." I lean in so that our shoulders are touching, and that's when I think I know what to tell him. "Sokie. You and that man are on different paths. He fights to be rich and respected and feared. You fight because you want to learn and get better. And you enjoy it. Most people don't enjoy doing what they do for a living. You're lucky. You're lucky to be so talented and strong and..." I pause, holding back a smile. "And good looking." Hisoka gives a small chuckle and leans into the chest.
"Babe, I met someone the other day," Hisoka looks up at me, confused. I always tell him when I meet new friends. "Well, I already knew her but I ran into her again while I was on campus." Currently, I'm taking college classes to get my second degree. What can I say? I love to learn. And we have the money since Hisoka's fights are so popular. "She goes to the same school as me and I didn't even know. She's an old friend. And when I say old I mean little itty bitty children old. I met her when I was 6, and we were best friends for years after that. Eventually we parted ways because we just led different lives, I guess. But we came together again."
"Is there a point, darling~" Hisoka drawls. "I only enjoy interesting stories." I poke his cheek and say, "Shut up, clown, I'm getting there." He finally cracks a smile and looks into my eyes, giving me the signal to continue talking. "I've always been above average intellectually, and so has she. Not even bragging!" You add after the jester rolls his eyes at you. "The point is we've always been on the same level. Turns out, she goes to my school half the time and another one the other half of the time. It's actually insanely hard to get in. Acceptance rate is low as fuck and you have to take a hard ass test for them to even consider you. I didn't even know the school existed, but she fucking got in. Now she's gonna graduate with a degree higher than mine, and we're in the same year!!"
Hisoka is still looking up into my eyes waiting for the point. "I was mad at first. And jealous. She has so many more opportunities then me and she's going to get so much further. We had always been on the same level so I was just thinking, like, 'when did she get so much better than me?' I couldnt get over thefact that she was so much 'smarter'," I make air quotes with my fingers. "Then I realized that we've just led different lives. She was looking for opportunities that I wasn't and that's how she got into that school.
"And it doesn't mean that she's better or smarter than me. And maybe she is, but that's not the point. Just because she's above above average doesn't mean that I'm not above average too. She's just on a different path then me. And yes, I may be a little jealous.... But I don't really have the right to be angry. It's not her fault. Or my fault. It's just the way things are."
"Your voice is beautiful, dear, I could listen to it all day~"Hisoka says. "But what does this have to do with me fighting?" I sigh.
"The point is," I exaggerate. "Other people's accomplishments aren't your downfall."
Hisoka pondered this statement for a minute. When he was done he looked me in the eyes again, laying his head down on my lap. "So you're saying my opponent has more accomplishments then me?"
"No! Lord, Hisoka. I'm saying that everybody has strengths and weaknesses. Everybody is on a different path. It's all about perspective. You lost a fight. So what? You're still the best. You're amazing using nen and still amazing fighting without it. How many people can say that? I bet your opponent couldn't beat you without his nen." I ran my hand through his hair, helping him calm down even more.
"You're the best to me, Sokie. You always will be." I give him a kiss on his forehead.. "Thank you, darling. I surprisingly feel better now."
"Surprisingly? You're a bitch," I roll my eyes.
Hisoka laughs. "In all seriousness, dear, it means a lot. You really helped me."
He closes his eyes as I stroke his pale cheek and run my hand
through his cherry red hair. "Sleep, my love. You need it." I kiss him softly on the lips and lean back. Opening my book again, I continue to read for the next couple hours while Hisoka rests on my lap.
A/N
the first thing i've published!!! i'm so proud of myself!!! i have so many more drafts that i need to finish and edit but i'll be posting more soon. feel free to leave suggestions (and also tips for my writing would be greatly appreciated)
