VIOLET SKY, takigawa chris yuu

━ chapter thirty-three

act iii

life will go on;
together?
no.

chapter thirty-three

❛i don't blame you❜

content warning: homophobia from a parent (no use of slurs, just amara being kicked out). read carefully my friends. if anyone is uncomfortable / doesn't want to read this chapter, i'll provide a summary in the end notes. stay safe <3

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Monday is hectic. She gets too many greetings from people she doesn't know, faces she no longer recognizes after being away for so long; the teachers aren't any better. Most of them want to hear how things were in Tokyo and half of those ones make her talk in front of the class.

It's not that she minds talking about it; it's just that talking about it inevitably reminds her of everything she left behind. Eiko, Chiyo, Hiro, Chris.

Thinking about him makes her chest feel like it's splitting open, filling up with this pain that suffocates her. It's only been two days since she left but it's also been two nights full of tears and silent cries. Luna hasn't said anything and Amara does her best to act normally around everyone else.

It's not necessarily that the world is ending, because coming back to the home that she has forces her to quickly realize the world keeps moving despite it all. Maybe later, she can mourn the end of their relationship, but for now, she has an act to keep up and it's easier to keep that act up when she isn't thinking about how much she misses Chris' hugs.

A distraction comes in the form of her counselor. It's the middle of the day, right before lunch, and she is already so tired of telling her classmates about her trip, how they treat Japan like some alien world, so this break is very welcome. Nothing to worry about, either, since Ms. Pérez, the counselor for the seniors, is very kind and actually listens to her.

"It's wonderful to see you again, Amara," she says when Amara steps into the office; Ms. Pérez always has a kind smile on her face, eyes crinkling, dark eyes twinkling. She's adored by the senior class, as they've had her since they were freshmen. "Take a seat, please. I just wanted to talk to you, see how you are."

"Sure," Amara agrees, sitting in the slightly uncomfortable leather chair in front of her desk. She fiddles with the hem of her black t-shirt.

"How is the first day back so far?"

"Overwhelming," she admits, brushing away the thoughts about lying. "It's a lot."

"You've been missed." Amara doubts that's it but simply smiles and shrugs.

"We are happy to have you back," Ms. Pérez says, leaning back in her chair. "Very proud of you, too. We received your final grades from Machida over the weekend, you did excellent. You don't have much else to do here, either, though you should look into joining some clubs. I know we only have three months left but it'll be something to fill up your time."

"Oh, uh, yeah, I'll look into it." She would probably do best in the art club. They don't have any important deadlines like the yearbook club does — Rena tried convincing her to join but it would be so hectic with last minute editing and decisions that she had to pass on it.

"Good." She pauses, thinking about something, lips pursing. "I have to ask, how have you been handling leaving? Settling in again?"

Amara shifts in her chair. "It was hard leaving. But I still have my friends here. That makes it easier."