Drown in my ocean of black box dye

Chapter 8

TW: HEAVY TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR MOST TRIGGERS: INCLUDING SH AND DRUG RELATED OVERDOSE.

DO NOT REPEAT THE ACTIONS SHOWN IN THIS CHAPTER.

Reason #60 to Live: Ochako and I created a special move today. She floats me high into the air, and I come crashing down 

***

His tennis shoes hit the pavement with a wet slap, the sidewalk rainy from the day before. Kirishima lifted his bangs with his fingers, a bit hot from the humid air. The birds chirped melodies around him, and there was a smile on his face.

His notebook was tucked under his arm.

He was heading to his favorite childhood park, where a very important testament to his past lay. Passing the gate, he opened the book, flipping through the pages.

It had been a week since his confrontation with Mina, and she had made good on her promise. She had left him alone, no insults or gossip; there was only passive silence.

It hasn't been as nice as he thought.

Sighing, he tapped a hand against the metal swing set, stepping in a puddle as he did so. Thankfully, the water was minimal, so his sock remained dry.

He had been noticing the little things a lot lately. Just the other day he realized Ochako, Iida, and Deku had matching bracelets. He had made a point to sketch them in the back of his journal.

Kirishima knew that the notebook would probably be found after he died. He didn't want it to be all bad. Maybe someone would read through it someday and realize he had been happy in moments. Perhaps, if they knew him, it would ease some of the pain.

He made it to the bench, sitting down on the cool metal after he brushed away the water. Leaning back, he basked in the morning sun for a brief second.

Blinking, he felt the drip of water on his face as the leaves on the tree above him shook. Some it landed on the pages as well, soaking through the paper into tiny splatters.

Staring at it, he pulled his pen out of his pocket and clicked it.

He set the ballpoint against the page.

Hello, my name is Eijirou Kirishima.

I am a 3rd-year student at UA High School in the Hero Course. I went by the hero name Red Riot originally, but it's since been changed to Riot. My hair was black in middle school, and then I changed it to red in high school, but I got sick of it and dyed it back. I like meaty foods and Katsuki Bakugou. I hate cowards, hypocrites, and the sound of styrofoam rubbing together.

I am also dead.

I assume you already know that by now since it'll be on the news. Don't worry! I promise I'm gonna get it right this time, and I'm not going to let anyone down.

As you can probably tell, I've been trying to list things that make me want to live and die. I'd like to say I gave myself a fighting chance, but I've always been a loser.

This year has been tough, but I want you to know that's not why I'm doing this. I know people are going to get hurt, and I know I'm leaving people behind, but it's better this way.

I promise you will understand eventually, when everyone is happy again, that I only ever dragged people down. Maybe it's selfish to want to die, but I really think it'll be better for everyone in the end.

Bakugou, Deku, and Ochako are gonna be great heroes, probably top ten, and mom and dad won't have a burden to look after when they're about to retire. My classmates are gonna rock the hero rankings, I can see it already!