WHO'S THE ONE?

CHAPTER 6:NIGHTMARE MOTHER

Trigger warning! Some of the scene might inflicted anxiety and depression.

"Ma tama na...maaa"

"Tumahimik ka kung ayaw mong madamay"

"Ma wala pong kasalanan si kuya sa away nyo ng kaibigan nyo at ni papa tama napo"

Parang ako Yung binubugbog ni mama kahit si kuya yung nasa sahig na iyak ng iyak at madaming pasa.

"Arayy masakit po"daing ni kuya

Kaya kahit na madamay ako pinipilit kong pigilan si mama

"Kamukha nya tatay mo! Kaya dapat lang na magdusa Sya !!"nanggagalaiti na sigaw ni mama

Diko alam Ang gagawin ko. Lagi nalang kami binubugbog ni mama sa mura naming edad at buntis pa Sya ngayon.

Mangiyak ngiyak akong lumapit sa kanya at sinampal sya. Wala na akong pakialam kahit mapalo nya din ako basta masave ko lang si kuya.

Nanlaki ang mata ni mama at dahan dahan na tumayo. Hinawakan ng mahigpit ang sinturon na hawak nya.

Matalim nya akong tinignan.

Ako ay unti unting umatras iniyuko ko ang ulo ko at handa nang saluhin ang pananakit nya.

Sumigaw si kuya

Kaya napatingin ako kay mama na may hawak na kutsilyo.

"Magsama sama tayong mamatay ngayong lahat!!!"

"Ahhhhhhhhh!!!!---"
Napabangon ako sa hinihigaan ko at hinahabol ang hininga.

That was a dream. A dream that  came from my past.

Biglang bumukas ang pinto at iniluwal nito si mama, kuya at ang kapatid ko.

"What happened?"natatarantang tanong ni kuya

"Nanaginip ulit si ate"Lira

"Anak.." mama said at parang naluluha

Tinitigan ko sya. Everytime I looked at her face, I admit that pain still strikes me.

Niyakap nya ako.

She is not my mother. She is the twin of my mother. My real mother is in jail. 11 years ago. Right after na maipanganak nya si Lira.

I tried to forget everything in my past and making myself believe that she is my mother but the memories in the past keep flashing back.

I also looked at kuya's scars of wounds in his neck. Pinaso sya ng totoo kong nanay sa leeg noong bata pa kami.

"I'm fine don't worry ok lang ako" I smiled

"Ate dito nalang kami matutulog"

And they end up sleeping with me. Dito na din natulog sina Mark at Leslie.

No matter what I do, I just can't get over. Natrauma talaga ako sa pambugbog samin ni mama, lahat kami nakaranas nun except for Lira.

Ewan ko pero nababaliw ako pag naaalala ko.

They tried to consult me to a psychiatrist but the expenses there was too high so I forced Mama Sonnie (twin of my real mother) to stop it and just acting sane to them. Though the depression and trauma is still living with me.

Walang asawa si mama Sonnie. She's now 46 yrs old.

___________________________________

"Jez.." kuya whispered to me while I'm watching dali and the cocky prince on my phone.

"Haha yes?" I am chuckling while turning my gaze to him..nakakatawa kasi tong part na yung words na binabanggit ng colleagues nya e it sounds "kiss" for him hahaha
Ah Basta nakakatawa Yan try to watch.

"I bailed our real mom"

I suddenly let go of my phone

Tears starting to brim into my eyes.

"You wasted your money over that unworthy person!" I can't control my furious now!damn it!

Kuya faced me with apologetic face.

"Jez, it's been 11 years and I know she already repent for her sins to us"

"No! She will never change!Have you already forgotten she did to us?She beat us like an animal!" Umiiyak ako na nag aapoy sa galit. I can't believe him.

"She's still our mom"kuya tried to hug me maybe to console but I push away his hands

"We already have our mom! it's mama  Sonnie! She's our real mom!"
Naikuyom ko na ang kamao ko at gustong gusto kona sapakin si kuya sa totoo lang.

"I can't believe that you will forgive that bitch---" my words are cutted when mama sonnie shouted my name

"Jezea!" Nilapitan nya kami at nakatitig sakin na parang di makapaniwala.

"Mama look what kuya did! He wasted his money and all of his sufferings to work while studying just to bailed that ..that evil woman"I cried into her chest. I felt distraught.
That woman is my nightmare.

"Respetuhin mo nalang desisyon ng kuya mo and besides I still have money to support his studies" mama said while tapping my back.

Humarap ako sa kanilang dalawa at di makapaniwala na gusto Nilang mapalaya yung babaeng yon!

"Bakit ang dali dali lang sa inyo na sabihin yan?Ikaw kuya remember the days na binubugbog ka ni mama and habang nakalupasay kana sa sahig ,sugat sugat katawan mo at mawalan ka na ng boses kakaiyak" i stared at him with sharp fierce he just sigh at yumuko and I can see that he's controlling his tears.

"How about you mama Sonnie. Who are you to say that we should let her freee?Bakit ikaw ba yung nakadanas ng pambubugbog?ikaw ba yung Araw araw umiiyak at hinang hina
ang katawan sa kakapalo samin ni mama? You were not in those times! You didn't protect us that time!"

Sobrang sakit na alalahanin Yung mga pambubogbog samin ni mama. Parang sumisikip dibdib ko kaya hinawakan ko ito at napaupo ako.
Agad Nila akong inalalayan.

Tatlo na kaming nag iiyakan ngayon.

"Kahit baby palang kami pinapalo na kami putangina lang! Demonyo Sya! Sobrang sakit sakin na pagmasdan mga kapatid ko na sinasaktan ni mama while me? I can't do anything dahil takot na takot din ako so tell me! Why we should forgive her!!!" I shouted at them

"Ate.." my 3 siblings uttered while crying.

Oh freak why did they hear me? I don't want them to remember those days that our mother abusing us.

I want to hug them and protect their minds at all costs coz I know they are also suffering from trauma but ...

Kuya stand up and wipe his tears.

Tinignan nya ako ng walang emosyon.

"Whether you like it or not, I will still bail for our mom " he said

Tinignan nya isa isa Ang kapatid ko at ako

"And anyone of you who will reject to my decision, dadalhin ko kayo sa psychiatrist or mental hospital para mawala na ng tuluyan ang trauma nyo at mapatawad nyo si mama" he said emotionless

Tinitigan ko sya ng sobrang Sama habang umiiyak.

I stand up and ....

I punched him.